5s on 5s: Cyclotron vs megadeth16 |
1 | | DJ Shadow Endtroducing.....
endtroducing our contestants |
2 | | Cybotron Enter
Cyclotron, joined 2015
- is known for his unfathomably based sellmeagod rating scale and the deluge of tears it has caused over the years as a result of rating almost everything a 1 or a 2
- is also known for adding cool music in particular based electronic singles to the database that no one thought to add before, only to then 1 them
- despite this he still has 5s, 5 of them in fact
- he rated this album Cybotron Enter a 1 btw |
3 | | Megadeth The World Needs a Hero
megadeth16, joined 2010 but has absolutely had other accounts too
- somebody recently implied not knowing of this user which weirded me out so hard i almost shidded myself on the spot but barely maintained
REGARDLESS
- is known for 5ing quite literally entire LP discographies of 70s and 80s rock and metal
- is known for being one of the first users to accidentally show us that the Sputnik objectivity stat TM will bottom out at 15% but no lower
- used to have more than ten thousand ratings at some point
- currently has over two thousand 5s
- has been banned and/or wiped at least a couple times iirc, many of his current ratings seem to be from the like 2018 onward |
4 | | Killing Joke Killing Joke
im not sure why we put killing joke here, but i like this album and i like this band so i'll allow it |
5 | | Christian Death Only Theatre of Pain
round juan: first 5 on the list
you don't need to know what deathrock is in order to think this album rules hard. but if you know anyone who says "death rock" but actually means slipknot, probaly dont recommend it to them. too bad this only has one troll review on this site. anyway this is one of two (out of five) cyclotron 5s that is directly post-punk related but the only cyclotron 5 that isnt woman-led |
6 | | 1349 Hellfire
round juan: first 5 on the list
in a series of over two thousand fives it's probably not entirely surprising that the alphabetised first will start with a number. unfortunately that number is 1349, which has no meaning in the context of megadeth16's ratings, profile or sputnik as a whole. it is supposedly the year the plague reached norway. too bad even the plague couldnt stop all these 7th rate norsecore bands. the problem with 1349, much like the problem with tsjuder, is that theyre just a shittier marduk, which in turn is just a shittier gorgoroth, which in turn was never an outstanding pillar of 2nd wave black metal to begin with. NEXT |
7 | | Cybotron Enter
this round goes to cyclotron despite his HARD political support for a industrially murdering males until we reach a 20/80 gender split |
8 | | Kate Bush The Dreaming
round tsu: most surprising 5
the reason this is cyclotron's most surprising 5 is because kate bush rules so hard she was actually successful in real life unlike most of the things that rymmers such as cyclotron and myself love to jock. not only that, kate bush has always been sputcore because not even this site of angry rawr rawr rockin manbabies could deny the truth inherent in her riffs and blasts. finally, this is the best and most consistently awesome kate bush album, so of course youd never expect anyone to 5 it instaed of the more popular one |
9 | | Shakira Laundry Service
round tsu: most surprising 5
its not even the only shakira album 5d by megadeth16, go figure, but yea
in a quasi-infinite ocean of rock and metal and solo albums by rock and metal musicians and some not too crazy other-genre picks like ice cube and daft punk... shakira |
10 | | Megadeth The System Has Failed
this round goes to shakira for being incomprehensible and baffling both in context of its user and relative to broader rating trends. although the dreaming is obv goated, it's also to some degree the kind of album we come to expect from cyclotron |
11 | | Strawberry Switchblade Strawberry Switchblade
richard roundtree: MOST VISIONARY 5
cyclotron's 5 of strawberry switchblade appears dated March 3rd 15. at the time, the rym entry for strawberry switchblade had literally 8% of the ratings it currently does (3544 and bolded). quite literally more than half of said 3544 have come in since 2021. shit blew up, and cyclotron fingered his nostradamussy to let us know far in advance, only we were too blinded by hate to listen. |
12 | | Sabhankra From the Frozen Mountains
richard roundtree: MOST VISIONARY 5
it's hard to imagine a visionary 5 in this massive cornucopia of vanilla straightforward rockmetalshit. the obscure picks are largely not that obscure, and nothing i see seems to rock the boat at all other than voivod but their peak has come and gone 35 years ago. ive never heard of sabhankra and apparently neither has anyone else, which is just as well for 2010s melodeath/meloblack/whatever, but i guess imma go with this in case someone decides 30 years from now that its actualy a secret cult classic? flimsy, i know, im doing my best here |
13 | | Cybotron Featuring Dillinja Threshold / Got To
this round goes to cyclotron, who btw added this single just to 2 it |
14 | | Siouxsie and the Banshees Juju
round fo: WORST 5
this is the worst cyclotron 5 not because it is the least good album that cylcotron has 5d but because it is the most popular siouxsie album, a recognisable genre landmark that achieved moderate commercial success, and worst of all an album that stole its name from a less successful album by an underappreciated black musician |
15 | | Sean Paul The Trinity
round fo: WORST 5
i mean. this is clearly the worst 5 so |
16 | | Megadeth Super Collider
this round goes to smegmabreath |
17 | | Jessica Pratt On Your Own Love Again
round 5/5: most recent 5
this is the only cyclotron 5 that is not from the early or mid 80s. it is in fact from the 2010s. one could argue this is par for the course for some genres of rymmers. now tbh ive never even heard of jessica, i can only hope she's not an actual prat. from the genre and relateds i can only surmise this might be the kind of music that necrotica would dig and review |
18 | | Overkill Scorched
round 5/5: most recent 5
this is the 20th (no joke, count em) LP by an 80s metal band that used to be pretty good at first but hasnt been good in at least 33 years.
i mean |
19 | | Cybotron (AUS) Cybotron
this round goes to cyclotron |
20 | | Queen Queen & Paul Rodgers: Return Of The Champions
conglaturation cybotron i mean cyclotron you win narrowly 3 to 2 may your reign be merciful and your harvest bountiful |
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