BigHans
User

Reviews 118
Approval 96%

Soundoffs 63
Album Ratings 3092
Objectivity 73%

Last Active 11-01-19 7:59 pm
Joined 10-08-09

Review Comments 30,959

 Lists
10.27.22 RIP Spirit ♦12.05.19 Spotify Artist of the Decade
12.03.19 Hans' Decade Jams ♦10.31.19 Hans Halloween Hard Jams Inc ♦
10.09.19 10 Years of Hans ♦08.14.19 Man Buns Need Not Apply - Monster Truck
07.11.19 30k, Up the Irons07.09.19 Metal Hearts (Ballads of Might)
06.24.19 How Am I Not Deaf Yet - 3 Years of Conc06.11.19 Slap My Bass (And Give Me Grooves)
01.24.18 Rec me SWAGGER jams09.13.17 The National "Moments" ♦
08.09.17 Roadhouse Jams05.25.16 Hans' Epic Concert Month
03.05.14 Riffs Of Smash02.26.14 Riffs Of F*cking Fist
02.21.14 The Rad RUSH 5702.17.14 Riff Goddamn City ♦
More »

2 Years, 20k. Is This Something To Be Proud Of?

So now it appears I am one of the top ten all-time time wasters on this site. Im not sure if that is something to be proud of or not. List is my 20 favorite reviews I've done, and 20 random things about me some of you probably already know.
1Limp Bizkit
Gold Cobra

I love classic era Metallica more than any reasonable person probably should. That said, their first albums are all 5's, deal with it homos.
2Bruce Springsteen
Born To Run

Although I always vote Republican, the main reason is because I vehemently disagree with liberal ideology more so than I agree with Conservative. So my official party is Anti-Liberal. I might be one of three people on the site that feels this way.
3The Gaslight Anthem
The 59 Sound

My Springsteen review is basically a rip off of this one I did but I don't care. I thank Sputnik everyday for helping me find this band.
4Johnny Cash
American IV: The Man Comes Around

At 31, I'm certainly old enough to have drilled many of your mothers, and its likely I did.
5Hank Williams Jr
Greatest Hits, Vol. 1

In case nobody noticed, just like Hank, I don't exactly hate the taste of alcohol.
6New Kids on the Block
Hangin' Tough

Grilling is good. Is there anything more primal than flesh over fire? I think not.
72Pac
Me Against The World

I am the whitest person that enjoys this album at the highest level.
8Hulk Hogan and The Wrestling Boot Band
Hulk Rules

This is a must have album. When I first got it I listened to it for a week straight, and nothing else.
9David Hasselhoff
Night Rocker

I set out to be a radio DJ in my younger days, somehow I wound up a software salesman. Figure that out. My favorite job ever was DJ'ing at my hometowns radio station where I was allowed to pretty much eschew the top 40 format and blast nostalgic 80's pop all day. People loved it.
10Metallica
St. Anger

(Done as OFace). I am a Dallas Cowboys fan although I actually hate them way more than I love them.
11Steel Panther
Feel the Steel

(Done as OFace) - my love for hair metal is 100% unironic.
12Soundtrack
Top Gun (Special Edition)

I believe many stereotypes exist for a reason. Example: if you are a Vegan who likes to play frisbee golf and hack and rail against the government and wear ironic t-shirts and shit, you probably didn't play football and probably hate corporate America. The inverse is also true.
13Billy Ray Cyrus
I'm American

You're damn right I like Country n Western music. I grew up in Minnesota for fucks sake.
14Manowar
Kings of Metal

The only thing that stops me from being a full blooded redneck is I actually have a college degree, couldnt fix a car to save my life, don't own a pickup, actually have all of my teeth (as of now), and have an appreciation for the finer foods in life. But other than that, yeah I'm pretty much a giant redneck.
15The War on Drugs
Slave Ambient

Aside from the birth of a child, I don't think theres any better feelign than being nicely buzzed at a concert and just unleashing all restraint, ROCKING THE FUCK OUT.
16Neil Diamond
The Essential Neil Diamond

I often get labeled a mysoginsit/chauvenist. I can see why. the truth is I'm just anti-femi-nazi-ism, and despise a certain type of female. I have very, very, very good reasons for this. What people don't know is I actually respect the good women (few and far between now) much more than I could ever respect any man. So figure that shit out.
17Mac Lethal
The Original 11:11 Sessions

My top 3 dream jobs: 1. Sports Broadcaster. 2. DJ for a metal station 3. Getting paid to write shitty reviews for some major rock magazine. I would have to sell my soul, but it would be easy as fuck and I would get alot of free stuff.
18Volbeat
The Strength/The Sound/The Songs

During my first year of high school, nobody had the internet yet, I had never heard of email, and a cell phone was something you only saw in movies. Life was amazingly simpler, and often times better (yeah I know I sound like the GET OFF MY LAWN dude).
19Westside Connection
Bow Down

But seriously, all of you Goddamn punks, get the fuck off my lawn.
20The Hold Steady
Separation Sunday

I love all of you. Except for Progmaster. Ok him too. Even if he's a fag.
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