User
Reviews 74 Approval 94%
Soundoffs 2 News Articles 31 Band Edits + Tags 4 Album Edits 20
Album Ratings 217 Objectivity 51%
Last Active 12-09-11 2:09 pm Joined 09-22-03
Review Comments 2,241
| 5 Most Annoying Trends In Modern Music
Jesus Harold Christ, shit's getting ridiculous these days... | 1 | | Dumb Misspellings Guilty Parties: Limp Bizkit, Korn, Trapt, most nu-metal bands.
How do you make a boring couple of words into a more noticable (and noticably fucking horrible) band
name? Simple: ask a 3 year old to spell them out for you. With such an unoriginal approach to naming
the band, it goes without saying that in most cases, the music followed suit... | 2 | | The "Heavy Metal Umlaut" Guilty Parties: Motörhead, Mötley Crüe, and oddly, Hüsker Dü, among others.
According to Wikipedia, this practice is "a form of marketing that evokes stereotypes of boldness and
strength commonly attributed to peoples such as the Vikings." So, maybe a horned helmet would make it
clearer to the guy at the record shop when you ask for a album by "Meurtley Croooou." | 3 | | Braidlocks Guilty Parties: Predominantly musicians in 90s nu-metal, industrial, and goth-rock bands.
So you want dreadlocks, but without all the hassle, dirt, hair-twisting, and abstaining from washing
that they entail? Why not get someone to braid your hair? "But it looks like dreadlocks from a
distance!" No it fucking doesn't, you look like a ridiculous diet-coke version of the Bad Brains. | 4 | | Br00tal Moshing Guilty Parties: Righteous Bros at Hatebreed concerts, and hairsprayed monstrosities at BMTH gigs.
In the decade or more since Sick of It All parodied it in their "Step Down" video, people still like to
pull "The Windmill," "The Lawnmower" and spazz out like a pissed up ninja in the pit. Newflash, cunts,
if your mum buys you your wifebeater tops / hairspray, then you're not a fucking ninja. Fuck off. | 5 | | Corpse Paint and Spikes Guilty Parties: Dimmu Borgir, Gorgoroth, Attila Csihar, and most Black Metal bands.
Honestly lads, when I feel like summoning the dark lord Aaag'a'tho'th through the medium of dark
misanthropic dirging, I do it in jeans and a t-shirt... | |
spoon_of_grimbo
02.23.08 | the guilty parties in number 2 (since sputnik obv. doesn't support umlaut-ed characters) are Motorhead, Motley Crue, and Husker Du. | spoon_of_grimbo
02.23.08 | and before anyone points out the irony of number 5 after seeing my profile pic, that pic's from halloween... | Eliminator
02.23.08 | Husker Du is a Danish phrase. They didn't just put umlauts in there to seem cool. | Poet
02.23.08 | LOL@your description of 5. | BallsToTheWall
02.23.08 | 2 is great, but 3 and 4 I agree with. I've wanted to try corpse paint but short hair and dickies would look odd. | VicariousIntent
02.23.08 | Ahaha, as funny and true as this list is, it's more for metal than modern music as a whole really. Still a good list though. | SCREAM!
02.23.08 | Funny description for 5 even though i kinda like the look for some bands (not all though) | Electric City
02.23.08 | You forgot TIGHT PANTS. | jrowa001
02.23.08 | the whole scene kids thing is terrible. bright shirts, tight pants, lots of emotions, and retarded hair-do's | TheStarclassicTreatment
02.23.08 | 2 and 5 aren't modern or annoying | DWittisarockstar
02.23.08 | 4 may be annoying, but god is it fun. Windmilling is one of the best moves ever invented in hardcore.
Of course, I usually abstain from hardcore dancing because the people who do it are usually giant douchebags who are too afraid to mosh. | Fjolnir
05.14.08 | ... But Corpse Paint and Spikes are fucking BROOOOTALLLL!!! |
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