wtferrothorn
08.22.15 | otters yo
they're pretty chill |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | all cats
followed by goats snakes and crabs |
wtferrothorn
08.22.15 | yeah, cats are great
cats>dogs |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | duh, dogs are shit |
Deez
08.22.15 | Nearly all primates but top of the list Silverbacks. |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | i dont like most primates, especially the more "intelligent" ones. they are too much like humans and humans are fucking awful. |
Funeralopolis
08.22.15 | dogs |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | lmao pedestrian choice bud, domesticated dogs are worst animal of all time |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | also dumbest animal of all time |
Deez
08.22.15 | Nah, they are human without all the bullshit. Thats the best part about them. They dont give a fuck how their fucking hair is and shit they just wanna get laid eat and sleep. |
Deez
08.22.15 | Maybe throw some shit at someone |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | when we talk about animal intelligence there is such a stupid double standard when we talk about dogs. like for dogs we say they are so smart because u can train them to do whatever the fuck dumb shit u want them to yet if u leave the door open they will go outside and yell at cars until they get smashed by a semi. how is being able to do menial little tasks for a reward a demonstration of intelligence, it just shows that we did a damn fine job of breeding them to be our little animal bitches. |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | "Nah, they are human without all the bullshit. Thats the best part about them. They dont give a fuck how their fucking hair is and shit they just wanna get laid eat and sleep."
disagreed, they have certain violent behaviours that only humans display apparently. using weapons and shit |
PlatonicMushroom
08.22.15 | I like the shape of the rhinoceros. |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | me too tbh, good call. |
Deez
08.22.15 | Youre talking chimps. Bonobos are our closest relative and have no violence in their societies because the fuck each other. Gorillas too are completely placid. Chimps are fucking crazy. |
theBoneyKing
08.22.15 | Cats cats cats cats cats |
Deez
08.22.15 | They use weapons for food not to attack. |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | yeah chimps i fucking hate chimps |
AmericnZero02
08.22.15 | Orcas. They're smart, social, and able to kill great white sharks. |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | and lots of other monkeys are obnoxious little shits but actually yeah gorillas are cool and like orangatangs. havent decided how i feel about bonobos yet. |
SCREAM!
08.22.15 | Bears >>tigers>>>>>everything else |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | fuck bears hard. seriously, fuck em. especially grizzlies n shit.
tigers rock tho |
Deez
08.22.15 | there a video on youtube where a group of gorillas sit around this white dude in a camp. Its crazy. Silverback gives him a look like "I could rip your face off any minute" total confidence.
|
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | thats scary as fuk |
MrNippleLipz
08.22.15 | I like squids and cats |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | octopus>squid |
Deez
08.22.15 | this squid tho
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3CJIKKSUpg |
Havey
08.22.15 | frogs, cats, rabbits, goats, owls |
Deez
08.22.15 | thats the shittest list of animals ive ever seen |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | nah he gets points for cats and goats but yeah lmfao frogs and rabbits tbh |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | also yeah vampire squids are hard as fuck |
wtferrothorn
08.22.15 | owls are pretty cool though, but yeah frogs??? |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | i mean there are some cool lookin frogs but ffs amphibians r LAME bro |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | and rabbits? there are deffs LAMEr rodents but rodents in general r fuckin LAME bud |
bloc
08.22.15 | I'm always debating this question with myself. It's either the golden eagle or the great white shark. |
adr
08.22.15 | cats, tigers, owls, crocodiles (looks cool af tbh), |
Deez
08.22.15 | You ever seen a Liger? fucked UP |
zakalwe
08.22.15 | Gorillas, whales, pumas, dogs. |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | golden eagle? over bald eagle? nah my man. nah
also yeah crocs r cool |
KrazyKris
08.22.15 | eagle, blue whale, manta ray & probably a few others |
adr
08.22.15 | toucans are the scariest animal for real |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | leave sput |
Sinternet
08.22.15 | Y'all motherfuckers need penguins. Also cats. And more cats. |
bloc
08.22.15 | "golden eagle? over bald eagle? nah my man. nah"
Bald eagles? Nigga, I ain't American. |
Ocean of Noise
08.22.15 | there is only one correct answer to this question and it is CATS |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | neither am i but they are still cooler than golden eagles |
wtferrothorn
08.22.15 | good choice Ocean |
Ocean of Noise
08.22.15 | o yea and owls |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | the owls r not wut they seem |
Ocean of Noise
08.22.15 | wat r owls? we just don't kno |
Ocean of Noise
08.22.15 | they're like cat-birds and they're adorable |
MrNippleLipz
08.22.15 | possessed by the devil being able to turn their head like that |
YetAnotherBrick
08.22.15 | owls, lemurs, meerkats, ostriches, chameleons |
Havey
08.22.15 | good to see a consensus is being reached: cats and owls rule and dogs are stupid af
stop sleeping on frogs tho http://i.imgur.com/AU1p2YO.jpg |
SharkTooth
08.22.15 | Giraffes, bison, and emus come to mind rn |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | weird pics |
SharkTooth
08.22.15 | I chose those 3 mainly because I actually had close encounters with each and it was cool af |
adr
08.22.15 | emus are u kidding and giraffes are stupid af, bisons are cool tho |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | i didnt realize they were aliens |
Ryus
08.22.15 | whales are up there |
someguest
08.22.15 | Wolf. |
SharkTooth
08.22.15 | would it be a good or bad thing to say Komodo dragons? |
L4titudes
08.22.15 | frogs, foxes, tigers, whales, dogs, cats, panthers, wolves |
adr
08.22.15 | Wolves are cool only on pictures |
Havey
08.22.15 | #frogsquad |
adr
08.22.15 | top froggies |
SharkTooth
08.22.15 | Im ok with frogs but rabbits are fuckin dumb |
Ocean of Noise
08.22.15 | frogs rule yea
pretty much all reptiles do |
Ryus
08.22.15 | i ate some delicious-ass rabbit last night for dinner |
emester
08.22.15 | Okapi
Its like a giraffe horse or something |
KrazyKris
08.22.15 | "frogs rule yea
pretty much all reptiles do"
A frog is not a reptile..... |
Supercoolguy64
08.22.15 | felines |
SharkTooth
08.22.15 | Okapi[2] |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | shut up kris |
Ocean of Noise
08.22.15 | well he is right. still they're close enough that I lump them together |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | yes he's right but that doesnt mean he shouldnt stop talking and go away |
smaugman
08.22.15 | dogs, dogs and more dogs as pets
animal would be something like mel gibson |
Deez
08.22.15 | well he is right. still they're close enough that I lump them together'
green? |
Ocean of Noise
08.22.15 | green? |
SharkTooth
08.22.15 | Also those Galapagos turtoises are great |
KrazyKris
08.22.15 | Tortoises in general are pretty cool. |
Deez
08.22.15 | Lesula monkey
|
L4titudes
08.22.15 | Looked up Okapi... THEY LOOK DUMB AS FUCK |
adr
08.22.15 | haha yea looks like zebra and horse in one lmao that's some really fucked up not suppose to be a thing animal |
PlatonicMushroom
08.22.15 | Creepy parrot https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=o8mQiXKKfWw# |
AmericnZero02
08.22.15 | Bonobos are absolutely violent. When a male bonobo takes power as the alpha it's common for him to systematically kill all of the infants in the group because they aren't his. Often via climbing a tree and smacking the infant against it until it's lifeless. |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | lovely |
PlatonicMushroom
08.22.15 | I believe my top three is cats, the kakapo and lemurs
The kakapo is a flightless parrot with dank looks and a wonderfully eccentric lifestyle http://youtu.be/9T1vfsHYiKY
Also whales, porpoises, dolphins, rhinocerosuses, corvids, elephants, norwegian elkhounds, owls and horses are of note |
ConcubinaryCode
08.22.15 | Mother fucking cats! And narwhals |
PlatonicMushroom
08.22.15 | "Bonobos are absolutely violent. When a male bonobo takes power as the alpha it's common for him to systematically kill all of the infants in the group because they aren't his. Often via climbing a tree and smacking the infant against it until it's lifeless."
I thought they were matriarchal?
Anyway lots of animals practice infanticide, e.g. lions, bears, baboons, chimps and even dolphins i think
"Bonobos are our closest relative and have no violence in their societies because the fuck each other."
Techically both subspecies of chimp are equally closely related to humans since the human line speciated from the common ancestor before the chimp line split. In terms of behavior humans are arguably more similar to the common chimp due to meat eating, tribal warfare and levels of violence |
Deez
08.22.15 | Infanticide is just a given in the animal kingdom. Its been spotted twice in bonobos. |
Deez
08.22.15 | They are matriarchal indeed and thats why they are ,in the large, not violent. You wont find any primatoligist reports calling bonobos violent. As said, Its just a given. Muthafucker dont wanna be looking after another mans baby. I can dig that. Id smash a human babies face on a tree in that case no dramas. |
SharkTooth
08.22.15 | @PlatonicMushroom
That video was beautiful |
PlatonicMushroom
08.22.15 | I think there's at least one species of matriarchal monkey where the beta males nurture babies in order to raise their social status. I think they live in Gibraltar or something. Also some baboons species use babies as baboon shields. When you can use em you don't wanna smash em. |
Deez
08.22.15 | yeah barbary macaques |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.22.15 | "Id smash a human babies face on a tree in that case no dramas."
lmao |
Sinternet
08.22.15 | +1 to kakapo that thing kicks fucking ass. Like one tried mating with Stephen Fry's head. |
Avagantamos
08.22.15 | cats |
PlatonicMushroom
08.22.15 | *Mark Carwardines head
Birds that are reared by humans get imprinted on them, basically thinking they are humans themselves. When they reach adulthood they will try to shag you as a thanks.
The kakapo is still very special in other aspects. I'll post a link to this wildlife travelogue by Douglas Adams (author of the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy series) in case someone wants to find out more about them. It's written in his inimitable style and contains some of his best jokes. First chapter is only ~10 minutes long and gives a good picture of the style of the book. http://youtu.be/cWJjzEmZVWs
Edit: the kakapo chapter is missing from the youtube rip. The tv version should be easy to find in good quality online Last Chance to See 5 - Kakapo (2009): http://youtu.be/wrmi5UV6-wk |
romulanrancor
08.22.15 | tony harrison is my favourite animal
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8mm2gLzjJ1roew1yo1_500.gif |
PlatonicMushroom
08.22.15 | Snow leopards are things of absolute pulchritude btw. Best cat after the humble domestic variety. So sad to think that virtually all species of big cat as well as elephants and most species of rhino are very probably going to become extinct in the wild this century ]: |
romulanrancor
08.22.15 | :( |
KrazyKris
08.22.15 | Btw are extinct animals an option? Cause the woolly mammoth would be a cool choice too. |
Evreaia
08.22.15 | Panda and Koala bears, followed by bears in general. |
brainmelter
08.22.15 | Wolves, lions, bears
ye |
Alastor
08.22.15 | no one said sloth yet? |
Sevengill
08.22.15 | The cuttlefish is the best animal. |
puntugruhm
08.22.15 | icelandic horses and sloths tbh |
puntugruhm
08.22.15 | fuck yes kris wooly mammoths are so goddamn kick ass |
puntugruhm
08.22.15 | http://www.amazon.com/Everett-Mammoth-Douglas-Cuddle-Toys/dp/B000O2K9S2
this nigga |
ArsMoriendi
08.23.15 | Killer whales because they're intelligent, graceful, and basically the kings of the ocean (seriously they can take down a great white shark with ease...) |
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | They're fucking vicious though. I mean when they catch a seal they first shake the hell out of it, and when it's half dead they start spamming aqua tail on it, sending it flying like 10 meters up in the air |
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | Anyway parrots rule
African grey parrot: http://youtu.be/ozgcKw4MyvY
Sulphur-crested cockatoo that jams ahrd: http://youtu.be/OHq4bYJbsBs |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.23.15 | "fuck yes kris wooly mammoths are so goddamn kick ass"
*were |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.23.15 | also parrots are fucking shitty assholes |
ArsMoriendi
08.23.15 | "They're fucking vicious though. I mean when they catch a seal they first shake the hell out of it, and when it's half dead they start spamming aqua tail on it, sending it flying like 10 meters up in the air"
Another reason to love them! |
Avagantamos
08.23.15 | koalas aren't bears |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.23.15 | ^this is extremely true |
TheSonomaDude
08.23.15 | I'm allergic to cats and they dont do shit. Dogs are stupid as fuck but they do some hilarious shit to keep you entertained. My childhood cat clawed me a bunch. |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.23.15 | probably cuz ur a soft cock |
Avagantamos
08.23.15 | pretty sure it's a stupid cultural phenomenon because they look like stuffed teddy bears |
TheSonomaDude
08.23.15 | my cat clawed my soft cock? |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.23.15 | your cat clawed the shit out of you because you're a soft cocked little weeny boy who's allergic to cats. |
Relinquished
08.23.15 | my dog killed a wolf so he's my favourite so far |
DrMaximus
08.23.15 | toads |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.23.15 | toads are whack as fuck |
Relinquished
08.23.15 | except the almighty hypnotoad |
DrMaximus
08.23.15 | http://i.livescience.com/images/i/000/040/249/i02/cane-toad-100624-02.jpg?1320189052
|
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | My cat once whacked a rabbit. I came home from somewhere at like 5 am and saw him sitting at the top of my neighbors' stairs looking very pleased with himself. I wondered what was up and looked in his favorite sleeping spot in the bushes and sure enough, he had hidden a half-eaten rabbit/young hare there |
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | "Chimps are fucking crazy."
Yea it's the only animal apart from humans that engages in tribal warfare. Basically a small gang of chimps go skulking in the turf of a neighboring community, and if they find a lone chimp which they can kill without any risk to themselves they pin it down, rip off it's balls and hammerfist it to death.
Also, when they attack humans they make a point out of ripping off the face, gouging out the eyes, chewing off the fingers and emasculating. |
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | >parrots are fucking shitty assholes
Honestly who can blame them
Someone should tally this so that we'd have a definitive list of best animals |
Deez
08.23.15 | More reason to love chimps when they destroy a human face
|
wtferrothorn
08.23.15 | "Someone should tally this so that we'd have a definitive list of best animals"
ill get on it |
ScuroFantasma
08.23.15 | Bears, cats, sea eagles, green tree snakes |
ScuroFantasma
08.23.15 | Cats are champions of this thread |
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | >ill get on it
Favorable mention = one vote, with no upper limit of votes, so as to make dedication pay off?
Here's some album suggestions, if we put effort into this i reckon we can get it featured
Cats - http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album/200446/Charlie-Haden-and-Jim-Hall-Charlie-Haden---Jim-Hall/
I know there are countless options but i find the minimalistic calm of this very stylish. |
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | Woah mogwai has three different animal covers
Birds - http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album/30223/Mogwai-The-Hawk-Is-Howling/
Dogs - http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album/78238/Mogwai-Travel-Is-Dangerous/
Cats - http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album/82563/Mogwai-Earth-Division |
wtferrothorn
08.23.15 | Yeah, I was gonna do it somewhat like that. Thanks Platonic |
Lakes.
08.23.15 | I'm a cat person tbh |
wtferrothorn
08.23.15 | Boom, you got your animals ranked. Cats win (obviously) |
Lakes.
08.23.15 | Although I love rabbits and wish I had a second one. Gr8 pets |
ZombicidalMan
08.23.15 | otters are pretty neat. I mean, they keep their tools in their armpits.
dogs are overrated and apes are just terrifying |
wtferrothorn
08.23.15 | finally, someone else that likes otters :) |
Flugmorph
08.23.15 | Birds bro. Birds are the shit |
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | Gotta point out that the kakapo got two votes and deserves more than a honorable mention.
Minor thing but the lemur album should be a monty python album because lemurs are wacky af and John Cleese likes them. http://youtu.be/D2KQdAODOuw
Also ]: for not picking my cat cover. Swee otherwise |
wtferrothorn
08.23.15 | Fixed it up, thanks for pointing that out :) |
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | (Whoops i was just checking if a link works and accidentally commented. I'll fill in something)
The indri is probably the coolest lemur. It jumps around in trees a lot and makes pink floyd noises (http://youtu.be/L5iqzSBGb6Y), but the ring-tailed one is pretty cool as well. I'm not entirely sure but i think it has stink glands on its arms and it fights with other lemurs by fanning offensive odor at them.
Btw this was my cat cover of choice http://www.sputnikmusic.com/album/200446/Charlie-Haden-and-Jim-Hall-Charlie-Haden---Jim-Hall/ |
Deez
08.23.15 | 'apes are terrifying'
Outside of chimps apes dont attack people. Unless theyve been locked in a cage by some retard because she has to make up for the fact she cant get no dick and will never have that cross eyed water head baby she always wanted, so she compensates by having a pet chimp in a dress. I like nothing better when those chimps turn on those fuckers and bite their eyeballs out. |
ScuroFantasma
08.23.15 | [2] times a fucking million |
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | >Gorillas too are completely placid.
what's the evolutionary purpose of all the bulk? is it a peacock's tail of buffness, utilized for convincing chestbeating, or does a silverback occasionally brawl with leaders of other troops? |
Rik VII
08.23.15 | Owls.
(waiting for Diamond Eyes cover to appear on top) |
Deez
08.23.15 | I have no idea. Its extremely rare Gorillas approach other animals. Within their own troops the only 'violence' is the odd smackdown when needed. And when the young mature into silverbacks to challenge the leading male at times but that doesnt aways happen. Infanticide happens with Gorillas too. Being vegetarian theres no need to kill so any aggression is within their own species and even that is rare in comparison. But yeah not sure what the evolutionary reason for the size is |
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | I'd say snowy owls are 4.4 and Eurasian eagle-owls are 4.2 |
PlatonicMushroom
08.23.15 | jesus i've been awake for over thirty hours, should probably consider doing something else than rating owls |
Mort.
08.23.15 | I like orangutans |
Deez
08.23.15 | ^^^ At last some sense in this thread |
NorthernSkylark
08.23.15 | cats easy |
Rowan5215
08.23.15 | "tony harrison is my favourite animal"
this mothafucka |
ArsMoriendi
08.23.15 | So me and another guy both voted for killer whales/orcas so they should be added to the tally :) |
Lord(e)Po)))ts
08.23.15 | Otters are fucking lame bud |
TheSonomaDude
08.23.15 | Lordepots is my fave animal |
trvvve
08.23.15 | list needs ottsels |
Deez
08.24.15 | https://vine.co/v/eHb2JUh6iI9 |
ZombicidalMan
08.24.15 | apes are terrifying for a number of reasons, but I'd say their brute strength is one of the biggest factors. While it's true that they are generally placid, it's also true that there is intra and inter-species violence, heightened when a possible mate is challenged or an apes territory is breached. Even shy old gorillas and orangutans are still violent, but obviously much less so than chimps or bonobos. Of course, any species will defend itself when threatened.
So, that being said, an animal which could literally rip my limbs off and beat me with them does not make my "favorite" list. |
ZombicidalMan
08.24.15 | orangutans are cool though, they're wise af |
PlatonicMushroom
08.24.15 | Some falcons do look m/ af
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/39/Brown-Falcon%2C-Vic%2C-3.1.2008.jpg
Orangutans are definitely the most chill primate |
Deez
08.24.15 | ;So, that being said, an animal which could literally rip my limbs off and beat me with them does not make my "favorite" list.;
See my favourite animal is something that in literally awesome. A big fucking Silverback and his toop in teh middle of Uganda chilling all day, given the odd tourist the death stare knowing he could rip you into pieces but doesnt. Something that is only a few steps away from us gene wise yet so different. A gentle monster. That constitutes as a favourite for me. Not some fucking house dog barking because you havent catered to its every need and shits all over your house. |
JWT155
08.24.15 | Obvious answer is dog. |
Deez
08.24.15 | obvious if youre a boring cunt. |
ZombicidalMan
08.24.15 | I cant agree on the apes at this point, but I agree about dogs. They're for boring cunts |
PlatonicMushroom
08.24.15 | According to research dog people are on average more extroverted, stupid and disagreeable than cat people so yes
Norwegian elkhounds are pretty neat tho, but then again I'm an obnoxious, boring cunt |
ScuroFantasma
08.25.15 | some apes are assholes though, they will literally hunt down and rip apart monkeys for fun |
PlatonicMushroom
08.29.15 | Cat Emperor irl:
http://images.cdn.yle.fi/image/upload/fl_keep_iptc/w_1600/w_1600,h_901,c_crop,x_0,y_85/w_300/v1440591600/14-svyle-24544655ddae1a8c2ca.jpg
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_macykj3wwt1qge3vro1_500.jpg |
NorthernSkylark
08.29.15 | no love for swallows? |
Deez
08.30.15 | swallow this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfVSmXUVrGs |