Snide: I'm Being Stalked By A MILF (Tinder Sucks)

Snide 03.25.17	This shit really grinds my gears, I just got one of my other exes off my back and now some random middle aged tinder catfish is fucking up my vibes and annoying my paranoia.
kascetcadettt 03.25.17	i do not regret reading this story hahahahah
kascetcadettt 03.25.17	HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
kascetcadettt 03.25.17	is she hot tho, give us pics
TVC15 03.25.17	Bruh if she a MILF then cop dat ass Give us pics [2]
zaruyache 03.25.17	even 4channers ask for date-tagged pics before believing any sauce yo.
ScuroFantasma 03.25.17	lol
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	SNIDE YOU DONT HAVE TO MAKE A LIST EVERY DAY
Drifter 03.25.17	3 is awesome
unclereich 03.25.17	Hopefully this is the last list you make
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	Is she from Brazil? Maybe she just wants a review copy of Snide Remarks
theBoneyKing 03.25.17	"and she enjoyed Pokemon as much as I did"
Snide 03.25.17	It's not that the girl wasn't attractive; I just don't fuck with catfishes, especially when they say creepy abduction type shit to me like that.
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	just stop making lists
unclereich 03.25.17	We know you dont fuck
Dewinged 03.25.17	Just give her a shake and move on man.
Snide 03.25.17	I would have moved on If I didn't get a text revealing she found out where I fucking live, after saying all that creepy shit.
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	03.25.17 I'm Being Stalked By A MILF (Tinder Suc 03.24.17 100th List! (Dragon Ball Z Villains) 03.23.17 Live Action Death Note Netflix Teaser 03.22.17 Snide Rap Side Project 03.21.17 Sputnik Dream Journal 03.20.17 New Black Malachite Track (Redux) 03.19.17 The Sputnik Story Part One: 03.18.17 Is Porn Bad For Relationships? 03.14.17 Black Malachite Debut Redux 03.11.17 Sputnik: Mental Association 03.04.17 Sputnik PSA 03.03.17 A Riddle (Part One) 03.02.17 IGN gave the Nintendo Switch a 6.7 03.01.17 Snide Review Schedule 02.21.17 Warcraft 4? (Fuck Overwatch) 02.20.17 Anyone Play TPPCRPG? 02.14.17 How Often Do You Feel Like You're Gonna 02.13.17 Fuck, Marry, Dump we might as well live with you tbh
unclereich 03.25.17	Where do u live?
Snide 03.25.17	If you guys don't like the fact that I make lists, maybe you shouldn't comment on my lists bumping said lists.
MrMongoose 03.25.17	Can you give her my number please? Hopefully she becomes obsessed with me instead of you!
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	or just don't make the fucking list
ScuroFantasma 03.25.17	1 list a day isn't a rule it's a challenge
Snide 03.25.17	"or just don't make the fucking list" What's so bad about me making a list, what impacts your day SO much about me making a list once a day?
EphemeralEternity 03.25.17	lmao
Lord(e)Po)))ts 03.25.17	this is hilarious
unclereich 03.25.17	What's your address so you can pokemon go on my face?
Space Jester 03.25.17	Maybe she'll make a sputnik account soon eyyy Converge
ArsMoriendi 03.25.17	I feel like Snide's internet persona is satire at this point
Snide 03.25.17	"Maybe she'll make a sputnik account soon" One of my exes made a kingdom leaks account to shittalk me one time but other than that no-one's gone as far as to sign up on Sput.
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	give us a new list every hour so we can make sure you're okay. worried about you. stay safe out there brother. wouldn't want your dick getting attacked anytime soon.
Snide 03.25.17	Ily Angry
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	What does "Ily" mean?
Snide 03.25.17	"What does "Ily" mean?" Bro, I don't even know where to begin with this.
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	??? but what does it mean???
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	idk urban dictionary says it means "i love you" but i'm pretty sure that's not what you meant
Snide 03.25.17	Ily is universal for I Love You What else would I have meant lmao
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	aww thanks ily you too ignore everything i just said ( until i probably say it again the next night )
Snide 03.25.17	Your endearing shitposting makes rough nights just a little bit better =]
Toad 03.25.17	this list confusion over what ily means thanks for sharing your ruined day to brighten ours snide, you're a champ
Snide 03.25.17	Hey Toad, glad my lists could bring joy to someone's day.
Storm In A Teacup 03.25.17	oh snideski this was perfect for those three shots of scotch I just had ahahahahahaa
Storm In A Teacup 03.25.17	just give her that two step clap already
Snide 03.25.17	"Scotch" See, I wish I had some scotch. I had fireball last night.
EphemeralEternity 03.25.17	I feel like you definitely attract these sort of ridiculous situations but for my sake i hope they continue because they're hilarious
SteveOffProbation 03.25.17	quality feature
Dewinged 03.25.17	Her love got u a feature. She's the one Dalton.
Pajolero 03.25.17	Got a quality laugh out of this, thanks OP.
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	I just realized is it a MILF if you don't want to fuck her, though?
henryChinaski 03.25.17	If she's "semi-normal looking" she's not a MILF...?
EnyaFangirl 03.25.17	...congrats...on...the...feature... :S
alienobserver 03.25.17	im throwing hands with whoever featured this turn your location on
zakalwe 03.25.17	Even if she's a total nutter you need to shag it. Never turn down a shag unless it's riddled. Then and only then consider doing her up the wrong 'un.
Sniff 03.25.17	Ala telling the truth honestly
Deathconscious 03.25.17	is this a fake stalking, snide?
Frippertronics 03.25.17	his alter ego has manifested and is looking to take over snide as her vessel
LethalPaintball 03.25.17	who decided this would be good to feature
ScuroFantasma 03.25.17	A hero
Storm In A Teacup 03.25.17	what would be great is if she finds him on sputnik and makes an account
Storm In A Teacup 03.25.17	oh my god I was successful in getting this featured. lmao!
Keyblade 03.25.17	" But recently I got a text which had a picture of the intersection right next to my apartment complex" lmao she's a g
Sinternet 03.25.17	Get her preggo then pump your leggo outta there Works everytime
Storm In A Teacup 03.25.17	how many times?
Papa Universe 03.25.17	Seems like your life is full of fun, aye?
Relinquished 03.25.17	seems like a LIE
dimsim3478 03.25.17	who unfeatured this ppl tryna make sput like a legit music site
Storm In A Teacup 03.25.17	it's the academy awards all over again!
FullOfSounds 03.25.17	are you gonna diss her in snide remarks
Dewinged 03.25.17	I hope to wake tomorrow to a list that reads: I'm being shaken by a MILF (Tinder rocks!) Make it happen tiger.
botb 03.25.17	Gonna go out on a very sturdy limb and say this never happened
Snide 03.25.17	Wait this was featured while I was asleep?
Storm In A Teacup 03.25.17	I asked for it to be featured and it was for at least 6 hours. I was laughing so much.
Storm In A Teacup 03.25.17	how does it feel that your most feature worthy list was a story about a stalker and not your music
porcupinetheater 03.25.17	Sput's trademark unreliable narrator strikes again!
Korpcun 03.25.17	Swipe left for Converge, swipe right for BFMV.
danielito19 03.25.17	she's got some low standards
Maniac! 03.25.17	http://www.livejournal.com/
Maniac! 03.25.17	"how does it feel that your most feature worthy list was a story about a stalker and not your music" http://images.memes.com/meme/913629
Brewtality91 03.25.17	Dude who the hell goes on a date with someone they met on tinder without first adding them on snapchat? lolol
BearzUnlimited 03.25.17	play her your new album, that will scare her away
RLWFormula 03.25.17	What the fuck did I just read
Snide 03.25.17	"Play her your new album, that will scare her away" I feel like if I played my Rage EP it would have better results in that regard.
Snide 03.25.17	"Dude who the hell goes on a date with someone they met on tinder without first adding them on snapchat? lolol" I'm not familiar with modern dating ethics so forgive me if I didn't add someone on Snapchat before I took them out to dinner.
Divaman 03.25.17	So really she's more of a MIHF, then?
Snide 03.25.17	"So really she's more of a MIHF, then?" No way in hell would I sleep with this chick.
Divaman 03.25.17	Exactly. A MIHF.
Snide 03.25.17	What do you mean by MIHF lol
TheSpaceMan 03.25.17	this is amazing pos'd
Snake. 03.25.17	mother i'd hate to fuck
Slex 03.25.17	I read all of this and I'm a stronger better person for it
Snide 03.25.17	@Snake: Thanks for the explanation! I've got another date in a couple days so hopefully that'll go well.
Lord(e)Po)))ts 03.25.17	"Dude who the hell goes on a date with someone they met on tinder without first adding them on snapchat? lolol" people over the age of 19 who don't get called "fuccboi" at least 12 times a day.
Snide 03.25.17	people over the age of 19 who don't get called "fuccboi" at least 12 times a day. [2]
frigyourgenre 03.25.17	Amusing list
claygurnz 03.25.17	If she's hot why you care
wham49 03.25.17	maniacs are always good fucks though bro, since she is already stalking you. LOL
Deathconscious 03.25.17	so shes a Mother I'd Like to Fuck that you wouldnt like to fuck? hmm.
Maniac! 03.25.17	"maniacs are always good fucks though bro" thanks
Tyler. 03.25.17	You make so many lists lmao
Rigma 03.25.17	"What's your address so you can pokemon go on my face?" underrated comment
Dedes 03.25.17	You can get a restraining order dude
Deathconscious 03.25.17	he'll be ok king, this probably didnt happen. hes likely just being an attention whore again.
Relinquished 03.25.17	it's not hard to make up bullshit like this
Dedes 03.25.17	Yeah I mean it's fishy but I like to be positive
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	H.I.V. positive?
Deathconscious 03.25.17	no
Dedes 03.25.17	Whatever you're into alchemist
ScuroFantasma 03.25.17	Stalking Snide wouldn't be that hard, I mean: "we set up a date at the Ruby's in the Irvine Spectrum (one of the malls not too far from where I live" All that detail
Snide 03.25.17	Everyone knows I live in SoCal that's not a problem, and several Sputnik users actually live near that mall.
ZippaThaRippa 03.25.17	The cougar stalks her prey
ZippaThaRippa 03.25.17	"Whatever you're into alchemist" Piss. He's into piss.
Deathconscious 03.25.17	lmao
Deathconscious 03.25.17	The Human Bedpan
hal1ax 03.25.17	irvine is like the safest most sterile city in the world how did u almost get raped there
ZippaThaRippa 03.25.17	lmao fuck you Snide
hal1ax 03.25.17	lol why this bitch tryin to censor u zip
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	who's censoring who?
Snide 03.25.17	Zippa you know why I deleted that one comment of yours, that was uncalled for and probably one of the worst things anyone has said to me on this site honestly.
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	wait what did he say?
hal1ax 03.25.17	take it ez cowboy
ZippaThaRippa 03.25.17	Oh for christ's sake, seriously come on man Take your panties off and untie all the knots for me
Deathconscious 03.25.17	"probably one of the worst things anyone has said to me on this site honestly." thats quite a feat. he should get a medal.
Snide 03.25.17	Zippa are you on the Sputnik Discord channel? I'll explain in full why I had a problem with your comment when I'm off work if you want to hear it.
bakkermaarten007 03.25.17	If a middle-aged guy would do this to a younger girl, it'd be a scandal and rightly so. But if a woman does it, it's hilarious. Hmmm (But seriously, just give her your fruity parts)
Tyler. 03.25.17	I can't even make eye contact with a girl and here one is following snide around
AngryLittleAlchemist 03.25.17	"I can't even make eye contact with a girl " http://www.sputnikmusic.com/forums/image.php?u=840110&dateline=1490485412
ZippaThaRippa 03.25.17	No I don't know what that is and I don't care to hear it honestly Frankly it should be illegal for you to take things that people say to you on Sputnikmusic.com seriously.
Tyler. 03.25.17	Lmao
Flugmorph 03.25.17	sounds like a solid marriage story snide'y
Tyler. 03.25.17	Yeah that is a pic of me you sure doxxxxed me
hal1ax 03.25.17	lol
zaruyache 03.26.17	"people over the age of 19 who don't get called "fuccboi" at least 12 times a day." People use apps like snapchat and kik as low-risk means to better communicate with potential matches/friends/whathaveyou outside of dating apps without having to give away more personal info than necessary. Protip: if you're doing online dating, use these.
Dedes 03.26.17	"Oh for christ's sake, seriously come on man Take your panties off and untie all the knots for me" was this it?
hal1ax 03.26.17	?
Dedes 03.26.17	what he deleted like did zippa retype it
hal1ax 03.26.17	na that wasn't it, and he didn't retype it
EphemeralEternity 03.26.17	have you considered that she's a fanatic Black Malachite fan (perhaps a member o the Black Malachite army Brazil?)
Maco097 03.26.17	faggots(?)
EphemeralEternity 03.26.17	weebs?
Dedes 03.26.17	One cannot love without loving themselves. One cannot have a fan without being their own fan. That's why he posts every song he ever creates 4 seconds after making it.
Rigma 03.26.17	is snide becoming tana mongeau? you decide
Intothepit 03.26.17	There's not a single made-uo story from Snide that would make me believe there is a woman out there that wants to touch his micro-penis. Although the fact that you made it sound like she thought you were her savior was a nice touch.
ZippaThaRippa 03.26.17	"One cannot love without loving themselves. One cannot have a fan without being their own fan. That's why he posts every song he ever creates 4 seconds after making it." You're 13
Dedes 03.26.17	Lol pick up on sarcasm dude
ZippaThaRippa 03.26.17	You're 12
Dedes 03.26.17	Try like 19 you fuckmothering cumdumpster
hal1ax 03.26.17	9*
hal1ax 03.26.17	and "fuckmothering cumdumpster" definitely isn't helping your case
Dedes 03.26.17	Lol dude i'm joking, no need to be so damn tense.
hal1ax 03.26.17	ah of course. a clever prank
Lord(e)Po)))ts 03.26.17	"People use apps like snapchat and kik as low-risk means to better communicate with potential matches/friends/whathaveyou outside of dating apps without having to give away more personal info than necessary. Protip: if you're doing online dating, use these." pro-tip: if you can't spot a catfish, you don't know how girls work
Lord(e)Po)))ts 03.26.17	protip 2: facebook exists
hal1ax 03.26.17	if you can't spot a catfish, you don't know how girls work [2]
Dedes 03.26.17	I can spot a catfish, usually found in rivers.
Brewtality91 03.27.17	"protip 2: facebook exists" Uhhh yeah but some people can't be found on facebook. If you either facetime/skype/snapchat them then you know they're real. Every chick I've ever met has been cool with doing one of these things because she's just as interested in knowing you're real too. Damn man I didn't think I'd ever have to explain dating on this site. lol
Chortles 03.27.17	"I can spot a catfish, usually found in rivers." great
MO 03.27.17	well that's what happens when you use the internet to meet desperate, horny people, you meet psychos!
SteakByrnes 11.12.21	lol
Snake. 11.12.21	man i love friedrice
Ryus 11.12.21	This shit is just wonderful. I've been talking with this girl on Tinder for a good two weeks, we have a lot of common interests and she enjoyed Pokemon as much as I did. The girl in her profile picture was this really cute short haired blonde chick who looked to be in her 20s. So we set up a date at the Ruby's in the Irvine Spectrum (one of the malls not too far from where I live). So I get there a bit early to be polite, a half an hour goes by and I'm beginning to think I got stood up. This brown haired semi-normal looking woman walks up to me and says "hi I'm Brooke", and instantly I realized I got catfished hardcore. So I asked her why she used another person's picture, and she said something along the lines of "I needed to be absolutely sure you'd meet up with me, I couldn't risk someone like you slipping away." I didn't say another word. I fucking booked it, and somehow she figured out my number because I'm getting nonstop restricted number calls (which I have to answer due to other situations in life). But recently I got a text which had a picture of the intersection right next to my apartment complex. Seriously, fuck today. I had such a great night with friends last night and instantly that shit u-turns. List is pissed off digs.
ResidentNihilist 11.12.21	This reads like a hawks or andcas list
Space Jester 11.12.21	Man I wanna get stalked by a milf
Underflow 11.12.21	we know
Demon of the Fall 11.12.21	feature pls
ResidentNihilist 11.12.21	Message of the list; don't ask horny men for advice about being stalked by a milf
Demon of the Fall 11.12.21	THAT'S the message here?
JohnnyoftheWell 11.12.21	unfortunately featured lists show up on the queue according to original publication date, not feature date but consider this boi validated
Demon of the Fall 11.12.21	I know, it wasn't a genuine request just paying homage
Devastator 11.12.21	Are we trying to summon snide back to sputnik but resurrecting all his old lists?
Devastator 11.12.21	Are we trying to summon snide back to sputnik but resurrecting all his old lists?
Koris 11.12.21	Are we trying to summon snide back to sputnik but resurrecting all his old lists?
DDDeftoneDDD 11.12.21	She s no milf then
widowslaugh123 11.12.21	Are we trying to summon snide back to sputnik but resurrecting all his old lists?