DamnVanne
05.09.13 | Am I screwed? |
Spec
05.09.13 | Smart with the b vitamins. Everyones body metabolizes things differently so I don't know, guess we'll find out. |
KotoFtw
05.09.13 | Yer probably screwed |
MMX
05.09.13 | Your probably boned and if I was your brother I'd smack you upside the head for making me look a dipshit |
Scoot
05.09.13 | why do people always have problems with this |
Insurrection
05.09.13 | 6 rules |
DamnVanne
05.09.13 | I'm also going to be outside all day tomorrow drinking water and sweating and drinking water and sweating and also napping in the sun weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee |
DamnVanne
05.09.13 | You know what's super lame about it Fourthdyke? Weed is legal here. Yeah |
Insurrection
05.09.13 | your best bet is using someone elses pee. theres no fucking way youre flushing out all the thc from your system in a week |
MMX
05.09.13 | yeah go buy a 12 year olds piss |
kitsch
05.09.13 | Aspirin not tylenol.
Those detox drinks have pretty good diuretics in them. Or you could take caffiene pills too. If you can find a lasix pill that would be the holy grail. If your gma has high blood pressure go raid her medicine cabinet |
DamnVanne
05.09.13 | yessir I am. I'm talking the test at a legit facility, so I'm not sure if someone is gonna be standing in the room lookin at my dick and therefore thwarting the substitution trick. I'll consider it though. I have plenty of Mormon friends who are clean as anyone has ever been. |
Eclecticist
05.09.13 | you should probably just kill yourself as the ultimate form of protest |
kitsch
05.09.13 | Best bet would to be to get someone clean to piss in a condom, tape it to your crotch and keep it warm with your body heat and then prick it with a saftey pin and 'piss' into the cup. Only way that is almost guarunteed to work |
kitsch
05.09.13 | I have never been observed taking a drug test and i have taken many. |
slipnslide
05.09.13 | "lol im so hardcore i do drugs" buddy do you even 25I-NBOMe HCl?
lol pleb alert
|
SeaAnemone
05.09.13 | I've been observed taking a drug test before
It was a tiny Asian man staring over my shoulder and it sucked |
kitsch
05.09.13 | What was it for sea |
SeaAnemone
05.09.13 | that was for the ncaa though and they take their shit very seriously |
cliiint
05.09.13 | your only option here is using someone else's piss. using as regularly as you have i wouldn't feel comfortable handing mine over to anyone for at least a month.
as much as i miss smoking i do NOT miss feeling the way you're feeling right now. |
slipnslide
05.09.13 | use a catheter and pump someone elses piss into your bladder |
slipnslide
05.09.13 | "excuse me can i have some of your piss to put inside of my bladder?" works every time |
Uranium
05.09.13 | suicide is a permanent answer to a temporary problem- put the gun down! |
conesmoke
05.09.13 | good old marijuana. The first organism to contain thc receptors (which eventually resulted in us having lots of them) was the humble sea sponge. Also, does anyone else find it fascinating that every organism on earth contains dmt? |
Kman418
05.09.13 | use a catheter and pump someone elses piss into your bladder [2] |
Trebor.
05.09.13 | Here's what you do, get someone else's piss (clean piss obviously), do a hand stand, and pour the clean piss down your pee hole, the clean piss will still in your dick for about 20 minutes so be quick about it before taking your drug test |
DamnVanne
05.09.13 | I luv you guys |
Aids
05.09.13 | you came to the right place.
ok, first what you have to do is
and the, it's important to do
after that, don't forget to
then, finally, make sure you
and that's it!! follow these steps and you should be in the clear. good luck!!!! |
kitsch
05.09.13 | reported |
kitsch
05.09.13 | Also, does anyone else find it fascinating that every organism on earth contains dmt?
and loads of other compounds that do even more interesting shit |
Negator
05.09.13 | "Best bet would to be to get someone clean to piss in a condom, tape it to your crotch and keep it warm with your body heat and then prick it with a saftey pin and 'piss' into the cup. Only way that is almost guarunteed to work"
Lmfao that was creative
I'd say just admit to the company that you smoke a little weed here and there and that you're not a unmotivated pothead/druggie or anything. Honestly goes a long way my friend.
|
GnarlyShillelagh
05.09.13 | when u fail just say you ate poppy seed muffins and ask for a retake next week ezpz |
Trebor.
05.09.13 | poppy seeds is opium dude |
Kman418
05.09.13 | or just walk in eating a poppy seed muffin and make sure whoever is testing you sees |
Trebor.
05.09.13 | yeah but testing positive for marijuana has nothing to do with poppy seeds which will make you test positive for opium |
Negator
05.09.13 | well if youre gonna fail a drug test might as well show them how much of a man you are by testing poz with just about every drug at hand |
GnarlyShillelagh
05.09.13 | you can tell them that someone probably gave it to you while you were at a party or something and you didn't know about it i bet they've never heard that before they'll probably give you the benefit of the doubt |
kitsch
05.09.13 | dont listen to anybody itt |
kitsch
05.09.13 | just switch to doing heroin, out of your system in 2 - 3 days max |
pissbore
05.09.13 | cone bro check out the book "dmt: the spirit molecule" |
kitsch
05.09.13 | if hes posting about dmt online i bet hes read it |
conesmoke
05.09.13 | I've seen the documentary, never read the book though. |
DarkSideOfLucca
05.09.13 | YEAH DRUGS
Well, except meth, heroin, coke, bath salts, etc
YEAH NORMAL COLLEGE DRUGS |
slipnslide
05.09.13 | lol normal college drugs? more like mainstream entry level pleb garbage
you couldnt even tell the difference between allylescaline and ganesha if your life depended on it lmao pleb alert |
slipnslide
05.09.13 | lol u prolly 5d bon iver |
Aids
05.09.13 | hahahahaha
why can't I "like" sputnik posts? |
Aids
05.09.13 | obviously @ both of slipnslide's comments, not you andcas you silly little internet ninja |
DarkSideOfLucca
05.09.13 | lol slip |
DamnVanne
05.09.13 | seriously considering telling the brass I ate some of that cake on 4/20. Maybe I can get an extension on the test. |
toxin.
05.09.13 | idiot |
DamnVanne
05.09.13 | And I know I'm gonna seem like a dumbass, but the worst part of that will be waiting another few weeks to start smoking again. |
toxin.
05.09.13 | agreed making your brother look like a tool isn't as bad as not having to smoke a couple of weeks |
DarkSideOfLucca
05.09.13 | Smoking now.
Man I'm gonna miss college in a week and a half. |
DamnVanne
05.09.13 | If u didnt have relient k on ur favorite bands toxin id delete all your comments and forget i ever read your name |
WeepingBanana
05.09.13 | get everyone else that's applying to this job high so everyone fails and they'll still higher you
haha HIGHer |
toxin.
05.09.13 | lol andcas people will argue with you even if you say 1+1=2 |
DamnVanne
05.09.13 | thats probably the cleverest strategy ive heard in this thread. Except for trebs "put someone's piss in your dickhole" gambit. |
DarkSideOfLucca
05.09.13 | What if my job is to blog about different kinds of stain of weed and their potency/effect/etc?
I mean, it's not but just saying.
Damn I'm high. |
DamnVanne
05.09.13 | i aint stressin at all. I get the job, cool. I don't get the job, woohoo I don't have to work at soul-crushing Walgreens |
toxin.
05.09.13 | "tox i have no ill will towards andcas at all, he knows this"
hm ok then |
Kman418
05.09.13 | umm no obviously 1+1=window did you even go through elementary school lol |
DarkSideOfLucca
05.09.13 | Have none of you read 1984? |
DarkSideOfLucca
05.09.13 | 2+2=5 |
Kman418
05.09.13 | oh ya what part of washington you in btw |
DamnVanne
05.09.13 | halfway twixt Seattle and Tacoma |
DarkSideOfLucca
05.09.13 | George washington |
Drummerboy123
05.09.13 | Why is everyone on Sputnik a fuckin druggie? |
Kman418
05.09.13 | oh nice i'm in kirkland btw |
conesmoke
05.09.13 | there's an obvious relationship between art and drugs. Music is art.
Aside from that, it's utter hypocrisy that alcohol is still legal. You wouldn't call someone who engages in alcohol consumption a druggie, yet it's negative effects far outweigh many many illicit drugs.
IRONY AND HYPOCRISY |
conesmoke
05.09.13 | just legalise and tax all the common ones... the war on drugs as it was has failed miserably. Also, many pharmaceutical
drugs cough'oxycontin'cough cough'xanax'cough are far far more addictive and extreme than many illicit ones too. |
DarkSideOfLucca
05.09.13 | Marijuana>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>alcohol
I love alcohol but it's so much worse for you for a million different reasons. Marijuana is pretty much the best, though. Shrooms are dangerous if you're not in the right mindset or if your a particular type of person, otherwise I think it's a pretty necessary drug to take (I know this is controversial) because it opens up your mind more than you could ever imagine, as does acid. I took molly a few times and it was really fun, but even that actually kinda skeeves me out now. Rant over, conclusion is marijuana. |
conesmoke
05.09.13 | Damn straight Lucca. |
Kman418
05.09.13 | never done any drugz actually |
DarkSideOfLucca
05.09.13 | m/ cones |
toxin.
05.09.13 | fuck yea kman unless alcohol counts |
toxin.
05.09.13 | alcohol is overrated, i only like it because i loosen up which is nice at parties and stuff |
conesmoke
05.09.13 | The fact that Silk Road is still kicking in full swing amazes me. |
Wafflez
05.09.13 | Bribe the inspector your weed. |
Gyromania
05.09.13 | idk if anyone else has said this yet but i'd be surprised if they haven't: use someone else's. they just test to make sure it's clean, they don't run a full fucking dna test or anything. |
VermicideReloadead
05.09.13 | Lol junkies, you're just the scum of the earth. You're just losers who waste your lives, money with garbage made by people who should be confined in a concentration camp cuz they increase the insceurity, the bad state of economy, the decadence and the corruption of a good society. Most of you could spend your fucking money in clothes, technology, a new car, books,delicios food,education or in some sort of bussiness; gladly, junkies have multiple uses, druggie fags like you will end cleaning hotels or my living room with the latest technology with your tounges |
conesmoke
05.09.13 | Firstly, your statement doesn't read properly.
Secondly, people who take drugs do buy things.
Thirdly, drug usage isn't all black and white... there's many many shades of grey.
Finally, i'd definitely consider being a 'hateful asshole' a waste of life. Which is exactly what you are. Cunt. |
Gyromania
05.10.13 | i can't believe you fell for that |
DamnVanne
05.10.13 | Damn Kman, you're practically in my backyard! We'll have to meet up at a show sometime |
DamnVanne
05.10.13 | Told the dude i ate weed cake on 4/20, it's all good, got all the extension i need. Fuck you, naysayers.
/thread |
Gyromania
05.10.13 | should have used someone else's urine |
DamnVanne
05.10.13 | I have a buddy who's been working in various labs for years, and he said the sample needs to be very,
very close to body temperature. So close that containing it in your anus is the only way for it to
work properly. |
Gyromania
05.10.13 | just heat it up in the microwave |
Gyromania
05.10.13 | or put it in a pot on the stove on high for 3 minutes |
keyokeyo
05.10.13 | Nah you'll like be good, it's all hyped up I passed a crazy laboratory test after 12 days following muuch heavier use |
DamnVanne
05.10.13 | can i still put it in my anus first? |
Kman418
05.10.13 | nice man it's a sweet place to live |
dsroka005
05.10.13 | smoke a joint about 5 minutes prior to the test results.. that always works to alleviate some of the stress for me |
MuhNamesTyler
11.07.13 | "I'd say just admit to the company that you smoke a little weed here and there and that you're not a unmotivated pothead/druggie or anything. Honestly goes a long way my friend."
Lol worst advice ever.
Sure it's already been covered but just go to your local headshop and buy some system cleanout |
MuhNamesTyler
11.07.13 | "I have a buddy who's been working in various labs for years, and he said the sample needs to be very, very close to body temperature. So close that containing it in your anus is the only way for it to work properly."
Yeah my buddy taped his to the side of his leg where his balls kept it warm and he passed
|
climactic
11.07.13 | ^ did the same thing. mini shampoo bottle filled with friend's piss on the inner thigh
i am a disgusting human being |
MuhNamesTyler
11.07.13 | was gonna try that for my probation in Atlanta but they have one stall they make you use and there is a mirror up above the toilet right at dick level and your PO stands right behind you and them eyes be on your penis like white on rice |
climactic
11.07.13 | mine was for a shitty job so no fux were given, if i were on probation id probably just not do drugs, not worth the risk imo |
MuhNamesTyler
11.07.13 | Yeah it's really not. I finally figured that out and quit everything for 2 years after catching a few violations |
climactic
11.07.13 | pretty annoying cause a couple of my friends on probation never got tested or got like 1 or 2 swab tests. so its a gamble |
MuhNamesTyler
11.07.13 | Dude I know like my first year I never even got tested, even after gettin arrested again lol but then out of nowhere it happens and you are fucked and then there goes 30 days of your life |
LambsBread
11.07.13 | Ok I'm only tellin you this cus I'm high and your avatarade me lol for a good min
Buy synthetic urine
Dawg
You just microwave it before you leave, comes with a hand warmer, has a temperature Gage. Called "quick fix". Seen It done many many times |
LambsBread
11.07.13 | It's like 15 bucks too |
MuhNamesTyler
11.07.13 | Wtf just realized this thread is old as shit lol f u captain |
