Catamenia
Eternal Winter's Prophecy


4.0
excellent

Review

by pizzamachine USER (635 Reviews)
August 13th, 2011 | 36 replies


Release Date: 2000 | Tracklist

Review Summary: tasty cheese is tasty.

Back in the day, when an album was called cheesy, it was seen as a compliment of sorts. Of course, some albums would exceed the level of cheese, but more often than not, cheesy music meant epic music. Eternal Winter’s Prophecy is undeniably cheesy, but this also makes it epic. You know the albums that make you want to don your Viking attire, grab your battle axe, and lay waste to a random village? This is that kind of album. Eternal Winter’s Prophecy may have nothing to do with Vikings, but there are some things that are so epic, they unleash the ancient man beast within. Rise, my brethren, and onward we shall set our sails into the bleeding sky.

To listen to this album is to realize its bombastic qualities. It’s melodic black metal with piercing shrieks, awesome riffs, and the like. What really sets the album overboard with bombast, however, is the melodic goodness. The guitar firstly provides the thrashing, but it also creates catchy, memorable tunes when combined with the keyboard. Although the keyboard instantly makes the album much cheesier, that is the curse of melodic black metal, and it is completely unavoidable. However, what it lacks in subtlety, it gains in a flawless performance. The melodies are so vivid and, well, melodic, that one can easily picture singing accompanying the songs. This is how melodic black metal is done when done properly.

One has to really scratch their head to come up with any negative aspects to this album, but even then, none are found. Eternal Winter’s Prophecy features melodic black metal that is more effortless than flipping a switch. If anyone was to complain about this album, their complaints would bounce off as merit-less. Any complaints about this album would originate from a person’s personal musical preference, and it is quite impossible to blame the album. I wouldn’t say that it’s up there with the best, but it certainly rocks hard. Check it out.



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user ratings (33)
3.6
great


Comments:Add a Comment 
pizzamachine
August 13th 2011


27668 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Good morning Sputnik! :] Time to have a shower.

DarkNoctus
August 13th 2011


12357 Comments


good morning! :] i just had me a shower and then a bath, it was relaxing and cleansing :]

review's pretty good, short and to the point, which is what i imagine the album is like so i guess it works. in any case, you've included just about everything. nice!

iFghtffyrdmns
August 13th 2011


7044 Comments


"You know the albums that make you want to don your Viking attire, grab your battle axe, and lay waste to a random village?"

I better not listen, I can't afford to go back to the big house again.


Nice review pizza, concise yet detailed and clear, as always :]

TheSpirit
Emeritus
August 13th 2011


30304 Comments


Not really a fan of this band or "is melodic black metal" in general but pretty good review dude. I enjoy the brevity, it makes them very reader friendly.

Tyrael
August 13th 2011


21108 Comments


tasty pizza is tasty

pos

DarkNoctus
August 13th 2011


12357 Comments


now i want pizza, darn it :[

iFghtffyrdmns
August 13th 2011


7044 Comments


seriously dude I'm starving.
but if I leave my current position that means I can no longer listen to Big Kids, nor can I post on Sputnik.
dilemma dilemma

Irving
Emeritus
August 13th 2011


7496 Comments


Dude do you do nothing but pump out reviews all day?

Irving
Emeritus
August 13th 2011


7496 Comments


Jealous, much.

pizzamachine
August 13th 2011


27668 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Thanks everyone :DDDD



Don't worry Irving, I do other things too! ;)

Metalstyles
August 13th 2011


8576 Comments


Holy crap pizza you're up to 134 already!? Damn man, you must be experiencing a boring summer :D.

Hyperion1001
Emeritus
August 13th 2011


27095 Comments


Morning Crimson is an infinitely better record than this but this still gets my cheesy keyboard side all wet.

Hyperion1001
Emeritus
August 13th 2011


27095 Comments


Cafeful i'm already all moist.

Hawks
August 13th 2011


93615 Comments


Good review man. I haven't listened to this band in ages.

Hyperion1001
Emeritus
August 13th 2011


27095 Comments


Bootz probably took it cause she hates you.

Hyperion1001
Emeritus
August 13th 2011


27095 Comments


Probably hiding it in her rectum you're gonna have to go in there and get it.

Hyperion1001
Emeritus
August 13th 2011


27095 Comments


K.

Acanthus
August 13th 2011


9812 Comments


Time to head to youtube!!!

Edit: After listening through this in it's entirety I don't think I'll be getting this, it was good but nothing drew me in/kept me enthralled.

Metalstyles
August 14th 2011


8576 Comments


You should still look into this band's other efforts then, Acanthus, if you found it good musically. Location: Cold and Chaos Born are both very well worth your time.

Sowing
Moderator
August 14th 2011


44509 Comments


I have some qualms about this review. I mean I have never heard the album, but some of the things you say still don't make any sense. First of all, I don't ever remember a time when cheesy was considered a compliment for music. Some people like the epic-ness of cheesy music, but that doesn't make it a universal compliment. Then there is this:

If anyone was to complain about this album, their complaints would bounce off as merit-less. Any complaints about this album would originate from a person’s personal musical preference, and it is quite impossible to blame the album.

That whole portion is basically saying "this album is perfect, and if you don't agree you are wrong"

Also you use the word "melodic" 6 times in 8 sentences in that middle paragraph. That's understandable when talking about "melodic metal" but I think that's only the case twice...the rest of the time you just didn't mix up your choice of adjectives.

You obviously can write, and I have read tons of good reviews from you, but this one just didn't do it for me.



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