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User
Soundoffs 6
Album Ratings 35
Objectivity 65%
Last Active 04-30-17 5:42 pm
Joined 04-07-17
Review Comments 910
| | Music To Mislead | | 1 |  | Bomb The Music Industry!
To Leave or Die in Long Island
Personal affairs; The separation of my mother and step-father, have left my mother and I in a rocky financial situation. | | 2 |  | Thurston Moore
Rock N Roll Consciousness
Currently, I prefer not to dig into the specific circumstances that instigated the event, but I'm comfortable just addressing the reality that this is going to be a dramatic, head first, whiplash nosedive into what will be my life for the next couple of years. | | 3 |  | Fleet Foxes
Helplessness Blues
I have undergone two parental divorces throughout my life- I am currently sixteen, eight or so years ago was the first, between my mother and father. I keep in contact with my father and visit him most summers; He lives in our home country of Venezuela, my mother and I moved to the U.S. post divorce, she put up allegedly a real fight to gain full custody of me. This current event is happening to my mother and I at a point in my life where I am mature enough to understand the gravity of the situation and for it to actually get to me, emotionally. | | 4 |  | Brand New
Leaked Demos 2006
Priorities right now are to find an apartment and to eventually take all our shit from the old house, further down the road I'll have to worry about finding a job for my mom will have to leave the business she co-owned with her ex-husband and her alone will not be able to provide for the two of us. This is not an issue for me, I am apt and very happy to provide for the two of us when it is so elementary what is in jeopardy. This is all inherently heavy but it was only until yesterday that I found myself crying over not any of what I have typed about above, but about the fact that we cannot pay for our dog which is currently suffering from some type of internal disease and that she will most likely stay in the house. | | 5 |  | Tyler, the Creator
Wolf
Apart from that episode, I've trying to make the most out of the reality of what's happening and I've been digging at comedic relief where I can find it. It's really all about moving on and distancing myself from the past, and not looking at this situation from a pessimistic, pitiful perspective. Yes; In all actuality, it's a pretty difficult part of both the life of my mother and the development and subsequent emancipation of mine, but I'm approaching it as a learning experience, and I hope that helps me take it in more easy. There are certain facets of my life that will have to put in the background, specifically the exploration of my queer identity as a transgender, bisexual teen closeted to my family, but I have a small circle of really tight friends who will suffice for support as far as all that goes. | | 6 |  | Junichi Masuda
Pokemon Diamond and Pearl OST
~ | | 7 |  | The War on Drugs
Lost in the Dream
Yet again has a lack of foresight blinded me and has left me in a confusing situation, notably a much better one. I was eager to indulge a new life from a position I had never before experienced, and since I was tired of the separation my step-father had dealt with for such a long time, perhaps this would've be good riddance. I was eager to reestablish myself and to meet the standards of my stepfather which I hadn't done before, and I saw the implications of the situation at the moment as a window to take advantage of. Taking this new change of plans and direction in, I am comfortable with just as much. I am only trying to make the best out of this, the most out of the least or most or whatever is offered to me. I am happy with staying in an environment I was satisfied and familiar with and further familiarizing myself with, I am happy with whatever fate has ultimately come to. I am happy that I will be with my lifelong pet for her passing as I have all her life. | | 8 |  | Father John Misty
I Love You, Honeybear
I saw this new opportunity and I approached it not with fear, but as a challenge. I am, in a way, sad that it was not my time to undertake it and to strength through it. Life seems too short to be a stuck up, rich kid; I want to experience both and all and any sides. I want to learn from people, I want new idols; I want to meet new people who I can safely say deserve respect. I wanted to move if only out the neighborhood because there is only so little you can absorb in a couple square miles. | | 9 |  | Arcade Fire
The Arcade Fire
There are experiences I'll only live being subjected to one path or the other. These last few months, I've had a desire to live the most that I can and learn the most about all that I see, and it has come across as obsessive and unnecessary. I was and still am leftover excited to work to provide, to instigate my own independence, but the safer path I now have ahead of me is fair, and I have no objections to settling for a while; I'll make the most out of this, too. | |
dreamgauze
04.22.17 | At the end of the day, I'm not looking for pity or empathy, I just feel like being open about the reality of the situation will finalize it as a chapter in my life, and furthermore, I also like sharing music. Will be adding to this list what I find myself listening to. | Satellite
04.22.17 | fuck. heavy shit. much heavier shit than i had to deal with at your age. i'm sorry to hear about your dog, too.
i can't really relate to most of what you're going through (apart from using comedy as a coping mechanism). you definitely seem mature beyond your years and with your positive outlook i'm confident/hopeful you'll make it through this unscathed. hang in there!!!!!!!!!! | dreamgauze
04.22.17 | thanx yeah, dog honestly needs more pity than me lol | Satellite
04.22.17 | have you considered starting a kickstarter for your dog's medical expenses? had a friend who did that. | dreamgauze
04.22.17 | at the end of the day if she gets any serious life threating episodes, stepfather will end up be the one paying for that so the money thing isn't inherently the issue, it's just that + many apartments don't allow dogs is what's keeping us from having her. | Satellite
04.22.17 | oh gotcha. that's the only thing keeping me from getting a dog tbh. | dreamgauze
04.22.17 | it's seriously the worst part to me about all this which idk could be silly but I can handle everything else, this is beyond my control. | butcherboy
04.22.17 | shit, I'm sorry, dude.. you're definitely way more adaptable and clear-headed about this than me or most at that age.. all will be well, I hope.. | dreamgauze
04.22.17 | thank you of course. we had a little foresight that this was gonna happen so I was anticipating and kinda prepared. | FullOfSounds
04.22.17 | Sorry this is happening dude. You seem to be ready to face the challenges and I admire your positive outlook. | dreamgauze
04.22.17 | Might have to repurpose this list; The finality and relevance of the situation felt like a last decision but when episodes like the one my mother and step-father happen, there always seems to be some inherent regret from both sides. Since my mom and stepfather are still currently co-running two business, it was hard to avoid each other the day after and it is not as if they were trying to. My mother just forwarded to me what happened just this morning; The conflict/fight happened two nights ago and we saw it coming so it felt like a final decision. Apparently, they're going to look for a family therapist because ultimately the reason my stepfather has been moody and dangerous specifically lately but overall in the last year is because he disapproves of the way my mother raises me, he maintains that she spoils me and that he is extremely disappointed in my behavior and attitude which from his perspective is confrontational. I will work my best to reconcile as hard as I was planning to adapt to a new environment, but there are absolutely issues beyond me in the equation to their relationship as a couple and our relationship as a family; My stepfather's incessant alcoholism which he uses as an escape for his day-time workaholicism and his conservative, traditionalist and stubborn views on issues that my mom is trying to help him with, specifically his health. I apologize for the list, it was probably a premature, kneejerk reaction. All things considered, I might delete or repurpose the list. | dreamgauze
04.22.17 | I will still be applying for jobs during the summer; My step-father wants to establish some level of independence and discipline. I understand his perspective, but this will only work if he also does his part. | dreamgauze
04.22.17 | Reflecting upon my thoughts and ideological outlooks on 7-9. Thanks for the sympathy and the empathy and everything in between, it's so kind and pure, and necessary. | rabidfish
04.22.17 | dude, life's hard and it may seem that it is unbearable and just plain unfair, but believe me...
There's no such thing as justice in this world that we don't forge by our own hands, people who decide to keep going and make the best out of what they get. Keep the hard work, keep the good vibes and positive attitude and I'm certain that everything will workout somehow. It might not be ideal, but hey... Nothing is, ever. | 50iL
04.22.17 | ^^^
Sorry for the huge problems Mane, but I know you'll make it ;) |
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