JohnnyoftheWell
05.01.23 | oh it's on |
parksungjoon
05.01.23 | if you get this one wrong im leaving forever |
Pikazilla
05.01.23 | scene daddy angst |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.01.23 | this is gonna get nasty |
DocSportello
05.01.23 | oooo |
pizzamachine
05.01.23 | Pls have mercy! |
DocSportello
05.01.23 | the calm before involuntary full body orgasm |
parksungjoon
05.01.23 | > I have heard it precisely once and because it is one of the more satisfying things made by humans maybe, once was enough
this has to be a joke right |
normaloctagon
05.01.23 | do the next one with my 5s you know you want to
"this is gonna get nasty"
bet |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.01.23 | no park i listened to spiritual unity for an unbroken 8 hrs following first consumption and paused only to meet the demands of my laundry hbu |
parksungjoon
05.01.23 | why an unbroken 8 hours tho
|
JohnnyoftheWell
05.01.23 | could not tell you i was listening to a record i could easily 5 for optics time was a secondary concern
update not sure wtf happened last round |
GhandhiLion
05.01.23 | La Koro Sutro is more than one composition
https://www.discogs.com/release/2915018-Lou-Harrison-La-Koro-Sutro
Ooh I made the list thing! |
Havey
05.01.23 | ghandhi's most surprising 5 is kind of blue (too listenable)
storm's most surprising is taylor swift (woman) |
Ryus
05.01.23 | justice for spiritual unity |
GhandhiLion
05.01.23 | Isn't bob dylan more listenable
spiritual unity deserves it all [2] |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | "storm's most surprising is taylor swift (woman)"
compelling case, but the slybaby played a full house on paramore as an insurance policy against that argument. tryna find a sting in the tail brb
we are closer |
DocSportello
05.02.23 | Coheed fans in shambles |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | we have only storm to blame for that |
DocSportello
05.02.23 | whoa this got real |
pizzamachine
05.02.23 | Meh, it’s only starting |
Gyromania
05.02.23 | Oof these are some awful awful albums. My heart goes out to you for enduring this |
pizzamachine
05.02.23 | 9 is doggie doo |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | okay now it has started |
ArsMoriendi
05.02.23 | Whoo Helium!
Wait you finally checked it?
And not cuz of me
Damn you Johnny |
DocSportello
05.02.23 | tasty twist! |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | I just saw this lol. Cool! Ive never even listened to a song from that Theory of a deadman album. Someone probably said something annoying and they had a low rating for the album. And yes Cryptic Writings is anti thrash cologne |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Johnny I came out of retirement I just wanted to be a two time champ |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | this unretirement has been noted but is it too late huh |
PotsyTater
05.02.23 | Oh god two of the absolute worst 5s lists on the entire site but in completely opposite ways |
Ryus
05.02.23 | >5 I Like Most Actively
>The Second Stage Turbine Blade
bruh |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | And yes Johnny that alexisonfire album came out when i was graduating high school.
Anyway, here are my real ratings for this list
1. OC/YC 3.7/5
2. Cryptic Writings 3.3/5
3. Dinosaur have never heard, would never want to hear 0/5
4. Second Stage yeah a 5 lol
5. Symphony no 9 yeah sure 5 whatever. Probably really a 4.5 tho
"Storm fucking knows it"
Honestly that whole paragraph was just confusing nonsense other than Im aware Delphine is a blade hiding as an innkeeper. I have no idea what im supposed to know. |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | The Second Stage Turbine Blade is a hood classic and better than any mom's basement psychedelic bullshit record ever made this truth transcends the contest |
Ryus
05.02.23 | "the greatest comic book adult Star Wars album ever made"
i truly cannot imagine a worse combination of words to describe an album |
Ryus
05.02.23 | that being said that album is palatable and its all their other stuff that sounds awful when they became even more proggy |
Ryus
05.02.23 | i just make sure not to think about the lyrics |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | "i truly cannot imagine a worse combination of words to describe an album"
「bladee music video fodder with dark academia proclivities」 |
Ryus
05.02.23 | i like some of those words |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | "storm's most surprising is taylor swift (woman)"
That...comes out of nowhere with no possible intelligent context. Lol. Why |
PotsyTater
05.02.23 | I think the point is that you have like 0 female artists 5’d |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Thats just dumb i probably have over 20 |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | by 0 i think you mean exactly 2.21% of all 5s |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | unsure of the gender balance in the vitamin string orch, but they were covering Coheed so it doesn't count |
PotsyTater
05.02.23 | “ Thats just dumb i probably have over 20”
“ exactly 2.21% of all 5s”
There you have it chief. Cope. |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | actually I missed out Svalbard, add an extra 0.4% to that my bad |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Cope yourself lol |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | If thats your criteria then it is over 5%. You guys have me talking now like I think my ratings are real. |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | So 97.39% dudehaven is too much but a mere 90-95% is the comfort zone interesting
I am going to brood on this and sleep and invent the rest of the tournament what will happen now |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | "So 97.39% dudehaven is too much but a mere 90-95% is the comfort zone interesting"
No thats not gonna work for me either. |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | 4.5s are just as good as 5s so you have to include all of them too. |
parksungjoon
05.02.23 | >The Second Stage Turbine Blade is a hood classic
lmao |
Pikazilla
05.02.23 | damn
storm is getting bodied out there |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | was gonna say that ghandhi's lead is p slender
"4.5s are just as good as 5s so you have to include all of them too."
but damn this is desperation incarnate |
parksungjoon
05.02.23 | It's not a fail to have a non-normie take on the Pixies output. Rather, it's reflective of me having developed my own views. That's actually a win.
|
Havey
05.02.23 | Without a doubt, the Pixies planted the seed of alternative music with their unconventional song structures, their disheveled style, and their sheer ferocity. Surfer Rosa, the band's first studio album, is a unique adventure that serves as a turning point for music itself. |
parksungjoon
05.02.23 | someday before i die i hope to hear a convincing argument for HoW TeRrIbLe NeW pUxIeS is |
Demon of the Fall
05.02.23 | the Choirs thing re Ghandi made me chuckle
this is a great idea, I enjoy reading them... especially the bits that are in no way scientific (or even logical). Good fun |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Fuck the pixies |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Thank you pika lol |
pizzamachine
05.02.23 | Need the next round |
SteakByrnes
05.02.23 | ty for using my suggestion :] |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Steak yousonavabeech 😃 |
Demon of the Fall
05.02.23 | I’m wondering what the minimum number of 5s is to be considered a worthy participant - I mean Phero is never getting picked 😆 |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | "storm is getting bodied out there"
I would have expected nothing less when it comes to my ridiculous rating scheme (my best guess the scheme is schizophrenia), but it was still hurtful for Johnny to call me a bland, uninteresting airhead. |
PotsyTater
05.02.23 | It’s part of your charm |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Lol. Ill take what i can get, but, i am one to add interest. |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | "but it was still hurtful for Johnny to call me a bland, uninteresting airhead."
??? where did this happen?
and why is this thread including it me heaping it so hard on storm this is a two-horse race to the bottom |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Pram
Helium
ROUND SIX: Mirror Move!
GHANDHI: On the other hand, the two one-word titles of Ghandhi's pick can tell you everything you ever needed to know about Storm with nary a synapse scorched. |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | I know what pram and helium mean. |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | Oh damn well, when you put it that way you do have a charm |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Granted my reaction is helping the pram part a bit but, you know, its part of my charm |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Nice. I did not see your most recent comment before also saying that |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | cute moment
time for a new round NOW |
DDDeftoneDDD
05.02.23 | This was fun |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Did you just add round 7 or did i just never read it |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.02.23 | i just added it and there are three rounds left
going to a show now see y'all on the other side |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Wow oh my. This is already the most owned ive ever been on sputnik lol. This should be fun |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | This thread basically sums up my wifes opinion on my taste in music. Fuck. |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Except for the female musician part. She would think im extremely inclusive. |
pizzamachine
05.02.23 | Hehe |
Pikazilla
05.02.23 | johnny you should've done storm vs pizza |
pizzamachine
05.02.23 | How do I join, who do I flirt with? |
Storm In A Teacup
05.02.23 | Well obviously johnny |
pizzamachine
05.02.23 | Eww I’m good. This sandwich I’m making though 😉 |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.03.23 | UPDATE okay let's bring this to an end |
Kompys2000
05.03.23 | Johnny Johnny your 5s on 5s series has everyone talking, who will eventually be pitted against sowing? Will you eventually join the fray yourself? Will ghandhilion EVER recover re: wine moms??? |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.03.23 | i am impartial um i am the umpire no entry no fray!
but v good question - can't decide if it would be funnier if Pots or Pika went against Sowing, so I might just play them of against each other and let the winner carry on |
Kompys2000
05.03.23 | Pots vs pika would be a bloodbath good god I want it |
Ryus
05.03.23 | oh god |
Storm In A Teacup
05.03.23 | Fun fact for entry 8. For many years i wanted a tattoo of that album. It was my favorite metalcore album for a long time and is still a top 10 metalcore album. |
PotsyTater
05.03.23 | Wtf pikas 5’s suuuuck and nearly every time he actually 5’s a good artist it’s the wrong album how dare |
Storm In A Teacup
05.03.23 | Pika is one of the most enigmatic users here. You can count on them to bring a unique taste. |
PotsyTater
05.03.23 | I don’t agree with a single word of that |
Storm In A Teacup
05.03.23 | Pika exists. Can you get with that or do you suspect that also? |
PotsyTater
05.03.23 | Hmm I think I fucks with that one |
ffs
05.03.23 | only 1 will sur5 |
Storm In A Teacup
05.03.23 | I think its 4-3-1 right now in my favor. |
Storm In A Teacup
05.03.23 | I added 3 new 5s all Cradle of Filth |
Flugmorph
05.03.23 | based cryptic writings 5 |
Storm In A Teacup
05.03.23 | I keeps it stormy |
Storm In A Teacup
05.03.23 | I know i won the round but you got the wine moms album wrong. My correct wine mom 5 album is The Game - Red Album. You can pull a lot of pussy with that album. Just sayin. |
porcupinetheater
05.03.23 | Storm understands nothing about wine moms
Oklahoma wine moms do not count |
Storm In A Teacup
05.03.23 | But they are hotter than the other states wine moms |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.03.23 | IT IS GONNA BE A SHOWDOWN |
Flugmorph
05.03.23 | i want to see me (the most positively minded user here) pitted against the most negatively inclined (pika or sm0k or whoever) |
parksungjoon
05.03.23 | cyclotron |
Havey
05.03.23 | potsy's earnest 5s against ryus' fake 5s |
Havey
05.03.23 | cyclotron vs. dunderbus |
parksungjoon
05.03.23 | megadeth16 vs literally anyone else |
Havey
05.03.23 | theacademy would be a viable combatant |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.03.23 | who are megadeth16 and dunderbus?
cyclotron vs. sm0k might be a viable quickie |
Mort.
05.03.23 | looking forward to the follow up to the wine mum round with a soft dad music round
and yeah argonian is the best race, always play as an argonian
|
Havey
05.03.23 | notice how trout mask went back in time and won the previous round for ghandhi, stealing a point from storm. you'd think it impossible since storm got that point by placing a Rate before time was invented. this is pure philosophy, but i like a good paradox |
GhandhiLion
05.03.23 | Yes tmr is about cute animals! |
DocSportello
05.03.23 | gr8 stuff |
PotsyTater
05.03.23 | “ potsy's earnest 5s against ryus' fake 5s”
Based. He’d have the optics dialed in. |
Storm In A Teacup
05.03.23 | "STORM: From my rosy '00s upbringing"
Um....i was alive for 100% of 90s. |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.03.23 | yes but you are not the umpire of this contest |
PotsyTater
05.03.23 | You may have been alive for it but were you sentient for it? |
Storm In A Teacup
05.03.23 | By 1992 yes but have vague memories of 91 such as family gatherings and happy conversations. I could describe a house uncle and aunt moved away from in 1991 and knew the main streets entrance. |
PotsyTater
05.03.23 | No one under the age of 25 is sentient |
Storm In A Teacup
05.03.23 | Youre sentienting something else. |
PotsyTater
05.03.23 | That doesn’t make sense |
pizzamachine
05.03.23 | I’m a floppy fish |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.03.23 | lol
what should the final round be I'm bummed |
ffs
05.03.23 | best 5 containing the most letters from the word five |
pizzamachine
05.03.23 | Most scandalous art |
PotsyTater
05.03.23 | Best album sowing would enjoy |
Ryus
05.03.23 | album you would feel most comfortable talking about to a stranger at a party |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.03.23 | will defs use that in future, but 3 strawman/ad homs in a row might be a bit much lol |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.04.23 | okay this is the end gg fuckers |
Ryus
05.04.23 | nico is one of my favorite jew haters she shouldve won |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | Honestly kind of Stan this story arch of resident obscurity fetishist getting bodied by the worst 5’s list on the entire site |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | Hell yeah pots I made quite the comeback 😃 |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | Round 10 was my favorite round. Thanks johnny! I owe you a new album to torture you woth! |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | Proud of you storm |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | Thanks! 😀 I cant believe i made it 10 rounds without getting called out for my only Modest Mouse 5 being Good News. |
pizzamachine
05.04.23 | Raise the roof! 🙋♂️ |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | Also i should point out that while Illmatic and I Am are both 5s. If we had a 5.5 and 6 out of 5 i would give Illmatic a 5.0 out of 5 and I Am would definitely get a 5.5. Nas' best album Distant Relatives would get a 6.0 as it is a top 2 hip hop album of all time. |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | “ Nas' best album Distant Relatives ”
….aaand I wish ghandhi won again |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | “ Illmatic a 5.0 out of 5 and I Am would definitely get a 5.5. “
I can’t |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | Can you reminisce on places you've never been
Can you close eyes see colors you've never seen
All things are related and creation is a package
Generate together and we increase the wattage |
DocSportello
05.04.23 | 👏👏👏 |
Demon of the Fall
05.04.23 | lol Storm won, shocker
well... not quite so shocking in that Storm's haphazard who-gives-af approach to 5s is more in-line with what Johnny enjoys, whereas Ghandi is the polar opposite in many ways, at least on the 'surface' |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.04.23 | Storm's approach to 5s is v much the opposite of my energy lol how dare
who will be next hmm |
Demon of the Fall
05.04.23 | hehe
(P.S. not me, haven't increased my 5 pool yet - not enough 'material' to work with in all honesty) |
GhandhiLion
05.04.23 | losing a round with nico :( |
GhandhiLion
05.04.23 | Wouldn't marble index be considered a "shadow-consensus guideline" album though? I always find it difficult to follow well speak |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | As much as I love johnnys unhinged linguistics I think he overestimates how much sense he actually makes to people who are sane |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | I have an irl friend like that and sometimes you just smile and nod |
JohnnyoftheWell
05.04.23 | TMI being a shadow-consensus guideline represents why the shadow-consensus is stale peanuts, and so if it goes there is less to represent this and the impression maybe dwindles
and lol sorry the entirety of this is pure stream of consciousness it had to be done |
Mort.
05.04.23 | As much as I love johnnys unhinged linguistics I think he overestimates how much sense he actually makes to people who are sane [2] |
Demon of the Fall
05.04.23 | (3) but it amuses so whatever, just don’t bother dissecting it to the point you’re trying to make it all work |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | Smae |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | I told my lady about this and she said "it's about time" 😁 |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | M’lady |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | Are you from Iowa storm? |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | Oklahoma |
Demon of the Fall
05.04.23 | my wife barely knows this site exists and I intend on keeping it that way |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | What’s the difference |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | Oh man the look my partner would give me if I tried to explain sputnikmuwic.com to her |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | I might as well try to give her a synopsis of a marvel, Star Wars, or Harry Potter movie |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | Oklahoma is more ignorant and more country with city people and country people who dont understand the other. |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | Honestly my music taste was doomed from birth |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | When I first met her she had an iron man phone case that I guess she got for free for some reason and didn’t care enough to replace and I said “oh nice iron man case” and she said “who’s that” and I said “the guy on your phone case” and she said “oh I thought that was Spider-Man” |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | MORE ig’nant?! |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | Oh yeah. Remember I told you I met Xiu Xiu at thr state fair after they told him they were cancelling his booking to play there because no one knows or would like him |
pizzamachine
05.04.23 | No Sputnikers are sane. |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | Comparatively sane* |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | Chillxbee, she was the sanest, probably why she didnt stick around. |
PotsyTater
05.04.23 | No idea who that is |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | She left before you joined |
Storm In A Teacup
05.04.23 | Oh!! I think i can explain my rating scheme!!!
Outerspace and distance can explain it all. |
pizzamachine
05.04.23 | “my wife barely knows this site exists”
I tell her everything. Well, my wife. |
JohnnyoftheWell
07.01.23 | the next round is coming soon the competitors are ready |
parksungjoon
07.15.23 | wait storm won?
bye |
Storm In A Teacup
07.16.23 | It is cuz i let the 5 flow through me |
pizzamachine
07.16.23 | Yessss |
Havey
07.16.23 | storm didn't actually win. if you actually count the points you'll see that ghandhi stole the round 8 point, a brilliant twist by the writer |
Storm In A Teacup
07.16.23 | I did win round 8 what lol |
Storm In A Teacup
07.16.23 | I won 5-4-1 johnny mistyped round 9 winner as rpund 8 winner |
Storm In A Teacup
07.16.23 | It was a wash either way for johnny lol |
JohnnyoftheWell
07.16.23 | bye park |
Havey
07.16.23 | it wasn't a mistype it was a clever time travel deus ex machina
it was even foreshadowed earlier in the list (saying ghandhi doesn't "do time"), this list convinced me johnny is a good wrtier so i'm going to read his reviews henceforth |
Storm In A Teacup
07.16.23 | Lol yes he is enjoyable to read |