Review Summary: That girl is a real crowd pleaser…. And the new king of rap has a new resident and he pays the rent. Watch the throne for this guy.
Welcome to the junlge (aka’s my review show. Ya its a nuthouse in here). Today, its you’re friend and musicphile the black Credeencea. My last review of the Shaun Melendez ‘blum garnered many positivities and only one negativity and I think that one was a trollster. Due the results of my twitter contest in your head and it seems most blak cradenza fans wanted me to review this debut album by a man named Gerald.
So first without waisting anymore time cuz time is money let me get into the meat and cheese of this review. But first let me give a little bit of backstory about the man behind the mask. Gerald is 27 and his mother is clinically gay. He decided to name himself G-Eazy which is an omlete to his Hero eminem. Also don’t forget his name is Gerald which is why he calls himself g-EAZY. Cuz Gerald is easy to remember.
Oh okay so thats enough backstorytelling so without furthering a duel lets get into the salt and pepper of this rapping landmark. Ill do a tracksy tracks review style and give each song a rating accordingly. If you dissagree with any of my comments or ratings plz tweet me or give this review a positivity. (note for ardent fans: dont forget to keep looking for hidden clues for my upcoming korn review. Put the peaces together to win my twitter contest)
Intro - this song was writting by christoph andersson and dylan thomas and that is evident here as it sounds nothing like a Gerald song youd expect. Not much too say about it accept that its a misleading song because it made me feel like i was listening to a christoph and dylan album! 4 out 4 stars because it is the best song on this ‘blum, im taking my hat off to these boys because they have a big hard future in songwriting.
Random - a song about how quirky and random G-gerald is as a rapper. He sheds his toughy mctough stuff mask for a minute to show how he’s the zooey d-chanel of rappers from small town oakland. Similar to a Macklemore song which follows the countercyclical trend of being goofy in the rap game as opposed to dead ass serious. 2 out of 6 stars, so 40% thats a D. A Great song but so bad compared to the intro. Stick to the serious rapping songs.
Me, Myself & I - Sleeper alert!! This song has the potatoes to be big potential if enough of the big G-easy fans (like myself) get there hands on this hardbody. With a hook that might as well have been crafted inside a radio station Gerald recruits the singing talents of some chick. And his raping is the best ive heard all ‘blum so far! A song oozing in new school rap narcissism that was severely lacking in the previous track. All these peaces dont a good song make though. Riddled with incoherency, this track bungles like all the rest and I give it 4 sticks out of seven sticks.
One of Them - A lowkey banger track about all the cars that he wants. Car heads will be drooling when he begins to mention lambos, and rari’s, and hondas and the list keeps on giving. Like I said pretty good song for car brains or people who are just getting into cars. Not a car guy so this tracks sucks, also not a fan of real rap so big sean’s feature disappointed me. Skipping the rating on this one cuz I dont know cars.
Drifting - Who remembers this from 6 years ago.. A hot bitch in a song saying ‘weeeezy on the track!’. Well they might as well have hired her to say that again because this person singing sounds just like Lil Wayne. Eazy-e raps here in a way that left me floored at it’s lack of remarkability. But lil wayne sounds great and I could see girls liking this song. Tough to give this one an unbiased rating though because im a big fan of Magnus Høiberg’s writing. 10 stars for the best track on the track.
Tracks 6 - 14. Two words. These songs are pure background noise. And I feel this is representative of Easy’s career in a hole. It was hard to stay focused and to keep my keen eye for reviews sharp when trying to provide a propelling opinion of his music. That being said what were left with is 8 of Geral’ds most vulnerable work yet that really showcases his raw skill as an artist. Hard to listen to and I got bored listening to them and I wasnt even really doing anything. Ran out of space on my video ipod so I deleted these off my itunes. They wont be missed. 5 stars
Everything Will Be Okay - The final track of the album and my oh my suprise it should have been an opener! this song closes the album so sick sinkly that I wish it had opened it so we could have heard two great songs write off the batch and then stopped listening. The only song that rivals this song in overall goodness is the intro which is still superior in every way shape and form. If you follow my reviews and make playlists of songs to delete and songs to not delete i would recommend putting this in the delete playlist. Twenty songs is a lot for one album and the first three tracks are so good save your hard drive space and just listen to those.
Now its time for the final thoughts section of my review and it will begin here. By the way the album is called when its dark is the perfect time to listen to korn’s sophmoric effort life is peachy. A thrilling exhibition of the darkness of an individual's soul put on display by raw chunky guitar riffs and the demon vocals of jonathan davies. Like rememebr that one interview from ‘98 where munky wore a funny red track suit and davies had on those willy wonky glasses and welch was like nu-metal Jesus. All that being said this review is helping to define Gerald’s career as the new crown of the rap. My only criticisms of the ‘bum are the lack of tracks. A complete feeling album has between 10 to 25 tracks. This ‘blum has about 3 which is fine for an ep but makes the blum itself feel lazy. G-lazy.
Thanks for all the emails and tweets and foodback from my fans. This has been a rough couple weeks and I capitulate you reading my lists and voting for my next tracks and tracks review. Remember to seed and subscribe. Much love from the whole Black Cradenza family and staff and happy holidays to all walks of life and religious things. Well be closed from reviews on december 25th for holidays days off.
