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User
Reviews 7
Approval 100%
Soundoffs 76
News Articles 12
Band Edits + Tags 131
Album Edits 112
Album Ratings 1170
Objectivity 87%
Last Active 12-05-20 9:13 pm
Joined 12-18-16
Review Comments 3,112
| Just wrote a JRPG plot
Anime fans, let me know if it's up to your standards. List is stuff. | | 1 |  | Bachi da pietra
Quintale
In the nation of Reviel, the Nakki revolution brought the Phrygis dynasty to power. Repatel is a young Akhra living in Bourbonne, a big city that gets its power from the Aetheria crystals. Repatel thinks that the Phrygis dynasty managed to reach power through the use of a Demiurge, a legendary giant robot that was illegalized two centuries before because it interfered with the Rhaetic field, which was necessary for the Aetheria crystals to work. | | 2 |  | Verdena
Volevo magia
Repatiel and his childhood friend Rawanko meet Estrellyne, who turns out to belong to the Phrygis dynasty. Repatel gets angry but still falls in love with Estrellyne. They find out the ugly truth: the revolution didn't use a Demiurge, but a Nephilim, which works thanks to an Ammydia crystal, the Aetheria anti-crystal (if they collide, they completely convert their masses into energy according to Einstein's equation E=mc^2). | | 3 |  | Henry cow
In Praise of Learning
The group, which is now called the Team of Almighty Resonance, tries to spread the word (the use of Ammydia crystals is very dangerous to a nation powered with Aetheria), but they get arrested. Curiously enough, they don't get arrested by the Asgard batallion, responsible for the law enforcement in western Aphelia (and therefore Reviel), but by the Aquisgrana Troops of the neighboring nation of Andriergos. | | 4 |  | Univers Zero
Ceux du Dehors
They end up in the Jail of Thanatokosmos in northeastern Andriergos (bordering with Akpinolten). The jail is Ammydia-powered, which is a problem for Rawanko, who turns out to be the personification of an Aetheria crystal. In prison they meet Hershiel, an Akhra just like Repatel, and he tells the Team of Almighty Resonance (ToAR from now on) that even though the Phrygis took power with a coup, they now have the support of the Revelian population. | | 5 |  | Art Zoyd
Le mariage du ciel et de l'enfer
This is a problem, because the ToAR has to face the power of democracy now. A hour long cutscene: what is stronger? The power of democracy or the power of friendship? Repatel is also absurdly horny thinking about Estrellyne, and there's a funny cutscene in which he accidentally touches her boobs while "sleeping". This would normally be sexual harassment (and possibly paedophilia since Estrellyne is a minor) but the cuscene is done in cute loli anime fashion so it's fine. | | 6 |  | Carissa's Wierd
Songs About Leaving
They break out of prison thanks to a mithril knife that Rawanko bought while on vacation in Venezuela. Out in the wilderness, they discover the existence of the Hayvanlars, small creatures that can be caught and trained and they can fight each other. Hayvanlar battles create perturbations in the Rhaetic fields, so they have to be reduced to a minimum. Also, Hayvanlars have the right to vote, which means that the ToAR has a chance to overthrow the Phrygis dynasty through diplomacy. | | 7 |  | The locust
Plague Soundscapes
Sadly, Repatel is still very horny, how could he possibly convince the Hayvanlar to vote against the dynasty? While in a big plaza in Erythria, the capital of Andriergos, they see the Nephilim attack from the sky: Reviel was taking them over! Luckily, somebody reincarnated the legendary Demiurge from the ruins of the ancient city of Nakki and the two giants fight, but then they are completely destroyed because of E=mc^2. | | 8 |  | mouse on the keys
Arche
The ToAR goes to Akpinolten and they see that it's still got crystal power, and it turns out there's a third kind of crystal, the Ketonia crystal, and Hershiel is the personification of one of them, so he's basically the anti-Rawanka, even though they share a passion for erotic Law and Order fan fiction. The two of them kiss (I know that they should annihilate and that this is a plot hole but fuck it I'll sort it out). | | 9 |  | Inventing Masks
Inventing Masks
They follow a peak of intensity in the Rhaetic field and they figure out another ugly truth: all of the crystals were made with Sonic's corpse, and Knuckles is next. Something needs to be done, but Repatel is horny so he copulates with Estrellyne, who turns out to be a Hayvanlar, and therefore faces discrimination in the Kingdom of Episyphia. He catches Estrellyne as part of a plan and tells Rakanwo or whatever his names was not to tell anybody. | | 10 |  | Ramleh
Hole in the Heart
They reach the border between Andriergos and Pakistan. The border patrol smells Estrellyne but the ToAR bribes the guy with 0.045 bitcoins and they reach Islamabad. Hershiel gets arrested for speeding and publicly executed by being fed to polar bears, and the rest of the team boards on an airplane to Washington DC. The Trump administration was responsible for the giants fighting and things like that. Final boss battle, ToAR against Elon Musk. | | 11 |  | Pram
Helium
Musk also knows about Hayvanlars and uses Doctor House, one of the most powerful ones. The ToAR wins, but victory means that the Quintaessance of their bodies dismantles and they esplode n'die. Their souls go to Valhalla, except for Repatel who is an Akhra and therefore his soul goes to Idaho. | | 12 |  | Menage a un
Anthems for Friendzoned Satanists
Last cutscene: Qusay and Uday Hussein wake up in Baghdad, the whole game was just a dream. They look at each other and they say: "Was dream. Was only joint dream, and not just this, was also very fucking." Also, this is my band, we're releasing new music in Q1 2023 and it won't make any fucking sense so listen to this one and get hyped, we're on all major streaming services. | |
CugnoBrasso
10.11.22 | Does anybody know someone at squaresoft | Sinternet
10.11.22 | can you summarise this in like six syllables im not reading that essay | CugnoBrasso
10.11.22 | Least I can do for you is a haiku sir | Colton
10.11.22 | the effort to comments ratio on this one isn’t gonna pan out too well for you. you always wanna put the least amount of effort possible into your shitposts | CugnoBrasso
10.11.22 | I made a 20-minute-long EP mixing Blink-182 with Norwegian black metal, actually paid 19 bucks to put in on Spotify and three people listened to it in total, I think I can handle this. | Colton
10.11.22 | I can be the 4th | CugnoBrasso
10.11.22 | Glad to have you onboard!
https://open.spotify.com/album/6284dO9p2RMBQdYla1yWbb?si=f77b49f9654d4343 | CygnusX1
10.11.22 | I thought it was pretty good, would be a great anime. What's the intro song? | Demon of the Fall
10.12.22 | Damn, thought this was a legit for a min there...
love the way this 'descended into greater absurdity' the longer you read it - early parts are actually a believable parody tbf, lol. I mean you could have pulled parts directly from an actual FF game or something idk, lost on me. Funny regardless.
Pos | Trebor.
10.12.22 | moody teenagers kill god | Sabrutin
10.13.22 | This is a message from the future. Loved the game and the story, though the hidden boss Piglianculo was maybe too tough. Really fun how the basic slime monsters were called sborra though! You became a great name in the gaming world. | MyNameIsPencil
10.13.22 | we've all heard of god falling to the power of friendship, but have you ever lost friendships to the power of god | CugnoBrasso
10.14.22 | "What's the intro song?"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQ6SZIWEL9A | CugnoBrasso
10.16.22 | It wouldn't be a JRPG without some sexual harassment. | CaptainPlasma
10.19.22 | I hate to be that guy, but don't you have steam for the gaming lists? | CugnoBrasso
10.19.22 | After a quick google search I can confirm that yes, Steam is indeed an existing website. Or you meant literal steam? |
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