User
Reviews 175 Approval 87%
Soundoffs 56 News Articles 13 Band Edits + Tags 9 Album Edits 24
Album Ratings 814 Objectivity 74%
Last Active 06-08-16 5:38 pm Joined 08-22-06
Review Comments 5,712
| A Few Fucken Records You'll Hate But I'm Lovin
and why | 1 | | Trivium Shogun
Woah woah woah, Altmer likes a Trivium album? I know I have this rated as a 2, but I'm gonna have to up this. Yeah they still aren't very original, but these are some talented and tight motherfuckers. The growls they brought back are unnecessary though. Also, love the Maiden worship, guys. There are just a bunch of really fucken awesome songs on here. Screw the haters, Trivium will go somewhere if they keep it up. They have to be a bit less pretentious, though... | 2 | | Tiamat Amanethes
Willie reviewed this and called it a generic rehash of their older stuff mixed with their newer stuff. I dunno, but I like this stuff, it's more uptempo, and finally it feels like they have lost the plod of their goth rock era. There is some tempo here in this shit, and I dig it. "The Temple of the Crescent Moon" is an awesome track. | 3 | | Porcupine Tree In Absentia
SW is a genius. No, he isn't overly technical, but this motherfucker writes the best songs in prog music without a doubt. All hail this album. | 4 | | Unexpect In A Flesh Aquarium
What the motherfucking fuck - OH IS THAT A FUCKING CABARET METAL RIFF WITH WEIRD VOCAL DUETS JESUS YOU JUST EARNED A POINT. This is too Mr. Bungle I guess, but fuck me if it's not awesome. | 5 | | Turisas The Varangian Way
These guys paint themselves and don fur coats. If something's cheesy on-stage performing, that would be it. Also, they have an accordion player. But nobody cares because these songs fucking rule. Give me my epic metal about swords, Vikings, and Dnieper Rapids and I'm happy. | 6 | | Jaga Jazzist What We Must
Pretentious post-rock with jazz. EC would like this, which means nobody else sane would.
But it's still good you know. | 7 | | Crowhead Frozen
Sounds like Tiamat meets Sisters of Mercy. Gay eyeliner metal.
But fuck me these songs are awesome. | 8 | | Sabaton The Art of War
Whores nagging about war. At least the whore singing sounds like he is a real man, therefore this whore metal with a not so whorey singer can be whored safely. If you don't, you risk full out war with the whores that listen to this whorable album. | 9 | | Burst Lazarus Bird
Pretto. But good pretto. I like my metal more pretentious. | 10 | | Kreator Hordes of Chaos
Not retro enough. Good thing they can rip off Slayer these days, so they at least sound good for their age. I still wish for a bit more speed to these songs, but at least it isn't gay like before. | |
jingledeath
01.18.09 | I like 1 a lot and 3 is excellent, why would anyone hate 3?
9 and 10 are good albums too.
I've heard good things about 4 but have yet to acquire it.
| Fugue
01.18.09 | 1 isn't as bad as most people make it out to be, 5 fuckin rules. | BallsToTheWall
01.18.09 | 4,6, and 9 are facking elite dawg. | Spamue1G
01.18.09 | Same as Jingledeath. | Electric City
01.18.09 | fuck you what we must rules and everyone knows it | Phantom
01.18.09 | This list contains too much cursing. C-
SHOGUN IS ACTUALLY PRETTY MOTHERFUCKING OK THOUGH. Matt Heafy is still a cunt though.
I didn't like 10. Deleted it after a few listens, all the songs sound nearly exactly the same.
| wakeupdead
01.18.09 | call me what you will but, Shogun was probably my favourite album of 2008 lol so props for 1 | Hyperbore
01.18.09 | 6 is the best thing on this god-awful list. | Knott-
01.18.09 | 3s brilllllliant. | handoman
01.18.09 | i like 9 | myhigherpie
01.18.09 | 10 is something to nod your head to violently. that's it. Who hates 3? | Chewie
01.18.09 | to PhantomLimb, go see Matt Heafy live and you'll realize how legitimate his ego really is. | Yazz_Flute
01.18.09 | The first 5 and last song on 1 were awesome but the rest was boring.
Stupid Dream is better than 3.
9 is the shit.
| Mendigo
01.18.09 | haha, I fuckin have to fuckin get the motherfuckin albums 4 & 6 now. I love music to be pretentious as fuck anyway. | Phantom
01.19.09 | I've seen Trivium live. Twice...Both as supporting acts, thankfully. |
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