BigHans
User

Reviews 118
Approval 96%

Soundoffs 63
Album Ratings 3092
Objectivity 73%

Last Active 11-01-19 7:59 pm
Joined 10-08-09

Review Comments 30,959

 Lists
10.27.22 RIP Spirit ♦12.05.19 Spotify Artist of the Decade
12.03.19 Hans' Decade Jams ♦10.31.19 Hans Halloween Hard Jams Inc ♦
10.09.19 10 Years of Hans ♦08.14.19 Man Buns Need Not Apply - Monster Truck
07.11.19 30k, Up the Irons07.09.19 Metal Hearts (Ballads of Might)
06.24.19 How Am I Not Deaf Yet - 3 Years of Conc06.11.19 Slap My Bass (And Give Me Grooves)
01.24.18 Rec me SWAGGER jams09.13.17 The National "Moments" ♦
08.09.17 Roadhouse Jams05.25.16 Hans' Epic Concert Month
03.05.14 Riffs Of Smash02.26.14 Riffs Of F*cking Fist
02.21.14 The Rad RUSH 5702.17.14 Riff Goddamn City ♦
More »

Hans' Top 15 Artists

This is 15 because I couldn't bear the thought of leaving some of these off in a Top 10 format. This is a combination of life influence, long time listening, and even now.
15Third Eye Blind
Third Eye Blind

Because the S/T is my 2nd favorite album of all time, the rest of their career be damned. Seriously, if you haven't, get.that.fucking.album. Best song, and favorite song of all time: Motorcycle Drive By
14Radiohead
The Bends

I've been on and off them for most of my life. I finally gave in and realized the true genius about a year ago. I always loved the Bends and Computer, but I hated everything else for years. Not the case anymore. Mind blowing band. Best Song: Either Let Down or Fake Plastic Trees
13Alice in Chains
Dirt

I like Ten better than anything they've done, but Pearl Jam turned into massive faggots after Vs, so Chains wins the battle of my grunge affection. Facelift and Dirt are bonafide classics, and Jar of Flies will tear anyone with a soul to shreds. RIP Layne. Best Song: Nutshell, duh.
12Guns N' Roses
Appetite for Destruction

Yes, Axl is a douche. Yes, they are a fucking joke now. But, Appetite defines the term HARD ROCK, and is still my favorite album of all time. If you combine the Illusions it is roughly a 7.5 out of 5. Best Song: Sweet Child O Mine
11AC/DC
Powerage

Surprise, they're not number 1! Listen up, fags who bash AC/DC to try to look smart, hip, or cool. AC/DC isn't about depth. They aren't about technicality. They are about ROCK, pure and simple. When I'm feelign in the mood for something contemplative, I watch the Shashank Redemption. When I want to have a good fuckign time, I watch Old School. Same applies for AC/DC. Best drinking band, ever. Best Song: Impossible to choose.
10Bruce Springsteen
Born To Run

Born to Run is an almost unrivaled rock album. The Boss is able to transform himself across multiple styles/genres, and he fucking nails them all. Legend. Best Song, and best lyrical song of all time: Thunder Road
9The Hold Steady
Boys and Girls in America

Because they fucking rule. Because I'm from Minnesota. Because they combine great, funny lyrics with fist raising rock, two of my favorite things in the world. Best Song: tie between Stevie Nix and Constructive Summer and Stuck Between Stations and The Weekenders.
8The Rolling Stones
Exile on Main Street

Because the Stones best 50 songs are better than the Beatles best 50 songs. The only thing that holds them back a little is how shitty they are now, but their classic era is pretty much unbeatable. See Beggars Banquet through Exile on Main Street. Best Song: Impossible to pick.
7Iron Maiden
Iron Maiden

My second favorite metal band, I probably like them even more than Metallica right now but I only started listening to them when I was 18, so their influence isnt as great. Timeless band. UP THE FUCKING IRONS. Best Song: Fear of the Dark (has to be a live version), or else its Hallowed Be Thy Name.
62Pac
Me Against the World

I was 16 when Pac got killed, and for the lack of a better term, I was fuckign devastated. Me Against the World is the only reason I got into hip hop, and I'm extremely fucking thankful for it. Best Song: Starin Through My Rearview.
5Johnny Cash
At Folsom Prison

3rd most listened to growing up, as a kid I remember being at the lake and my Dad constantly playign At Folsom Prison during campfire parties. It kind of pisses me off that all of a sudden everyone and their brother became a fan after he died, but I guess if it helps his music live on, all the better. Best song, and best country song of all time = Cocaine Blues (Folsom Prison version)
4Bob Dylan
Blood on the Tracks

2nd most listened to growing up after the Beatles. My dad was a huge fan boy, and it rubbed off. Granted, some of his stuff is utterly and epicly atrocious, but his best work (Blood, Highway 61, Blonde, Freewheelin, etc) is pure fucking gold. Best song: Desolation Row. Probably.
3Led Zeppelin
Physical Graffiti

Greatest Hard Rock band of all-time, and it isn't close. So what if Page ripped off a few cats along the way, the man was a genius and an exceptional songwriter. Plant is arguably the greatest rock vocalist of all-time, Bonham is the greatest rock drummer of all time, and Zep 4 is the greatest rock album of all time.
2The Beatles
Rubber Soul

The first music I ever remember hearing. I was like 3. A lifelong love affair was born. Objectively speaking, the greatest band in history, period. Best Song: Fuck, I can't choose.
1Metallica
Master of Puppets

It was difficult to choose between Metallica and the Beatles, as they have had the greatest influence on me. Metallica ultimately wins because they opened the doors for metal, which opened the doors for almost everything hard rock based for me. That, and Kill Em All-Black is the easily the greatest run in Metal history. Its not even close, so give up, faggots. Best Song: Master of Puppets
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